Monday, February 11, 2008

The Decline of American Civilization
Um... I'm sitting here on the couch just answering emails now that the kids are asleep, and it's 8:17 and I feel like I want to take a fork and stab myself in the eye repeatedly, because I put on American Gladiators, which I've never watched, just to have the TV on in the background. It is the most ridiculous crap you've ever seen (oh my god, Hulk Hogan just said "Testify, girl." Seriously.) The ONLY way to watch this show is ironically. "Normal" people compete against the "gladiators," which include a bunch of pinhead men (see pic at right) and over-steroided women who probably stopped menstruating a decade ago. There's one woman on here named Hellga (and Hogan says it like HELL-ga) who just looks overweight.

PLEASE end that writer's strike, because with this show, television has officially gone to pot.

12 comments:

  1. But this is just the revival. What explains the first incarnation?

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  2. Hmm... did it happen during the previous writer's strike, by any chance??

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  3. lots of people are taking shots at gladiators, but i still think it's not as low-brow as "deal or no deal"...at least gladiators does reward athleticism. if you ignore the hogan/ali cheesiness and the prepared interviews, and just watch the events, i don't think it's so bad! and some of the events look fun (i must admit, i wish i was in good enough shape to do that eliminator obstacle course!)

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  4. Nikki, your kids just aren't old enough yet. My son loves this show, and if I record it so I can fast forward past the Hulk-speak and inappropriate commercials, it's a fun way to watch TV with an 8-year-old. And watching Wolf howl beats the stew out of any American Idol contestant ever.

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  5. I used to watch the original one. *hangs head in shame* I liked Superstars too. Nothing like watching William Shatner in a kayak race.

    Sports for people who hate sports.

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  6. From cnn.com

    Damon Lindelof is eager for some answers. An executive producer of ABC's mystery serial "Lost," he should learn this week what his show's future holds as it closes out its fourth season.

    "Lost" has been back on the air just two weeks. But the strike meant a planned 16-episode shooting schedule was halted after just eight episodes were shot. Fans braced themselves for no more this season.

    "But we very much want to come back and do as many episodes as possible," said Lindelof, who then listed a few issues that first need to be settled.

    "How many episodes can best serve our story? And what are the production realities?" He noted that the shooting facility in Hawaii, 2,500 miles from his Los Angeles office, had been shuttered since Thanksgiving. The crew has dispersed, the huge cast has scattered.

    The first new post-strike episode of "Lost" could possibly be ready for broadcast the week after episode eight appears, he said. There likely would be three or four more after that.

    Could there be even more?

    "I'd be surprised if the network wanted to air episodes deep into the summer," he said. But if all the pieces fell into place, "Lost" fans would be blessed: "I don't see why we couldn't deliver all eight remaining episodes."

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  7. redeem et al: I must also hang my head in shame, for after I posted this I continued answering emails while keeping American Gladiators. And I watched it to the end. I cringed every time Hogan and Ali (what will she do NEXT to tarnish the family name??) were on screen, but Leor, you are absolutely right about the endurance challenge at the end. Man, *I* could barely move after watching those women pull themselves through that obstacle course.

    I won't be making this a weekly show, but it was definitely entertaining. That said, if this is the sort of show that gets shows like Friday Night Lights cancelled, I'd rather have my FNL. ;)

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  8. Well it is more or less clothing optional, which is something I like. :-)

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  9. I smell an American Gladiators book coming! LOL

    By the way Nikki, a little off topic but with 5 planned new post strike episodes, are we sure that we don't lose those episodes and they get rolled into next year ie 19 episodes for Season 5??? I've heard both stories.

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  10. Seven words: My Dad is Better Than Your Dad. . .

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  11. I think you promised to post your thoughts on what you thought of American Gladiator AFTER the show was finished. By posting mid-way through the episode, you clearly weren't giving the show the chance it deserves. American Gladiator is one of the few true-to-life reality shows, celebrating young athletic types who bring 110% to every challenge, no matter how difficult. Furthermore, the show shows the public how to deal with a real life problem like being attacked by a steroid induced behemoth who is shooting at you with a tennis ball gun. I mean, in the movies, you'd be dead. In real life, you'd grab for your nerf rocket launchers to counter his or her attacks. This show finally deals with these every day issues.

    You can hate all you want . . . but WHATCHA GONNA DO WHEN HOGAN'S 24 INCH PYTHONS GRAB HOLD OF YOU?!

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  12. I see you posted your thoughts after the show as well. You are redeemed, except for the cringing of Hogan and Ali. Once you watch a few more episodes, which I know you will, you will realize they are the heart and soul of the series, and it's nothing without them. I will get you the season 1 box set when it's released, though I'm sure you already have it on pre-order. :)

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