The Return of AWESOME TV

Ah, the week I've been waiting for! No, it has nothing to do with 2008-2009 shows premiering... none have particularly grabbed me, though Fringe is definitely showing a lot of potential. No, it's the week of the return of the 2008 shows, the ones that were mercilessly cut short due to the writer's strike, but lived to appear another day.

Tonight at 8 is the return of Chuck, a show I cannot recommend enough. It's a sweet, funny show with a spy element to it, and the relationship between Chuck and his part-time nemesis, part-time lover Sarah is bittersweet and always complicated. His nest of nerddom at the techie store where he works rounds out the storyline (well, them and Captain Awesome). See, the show hasn't been on in an eternity, and I remember every part of it by heart. And I only watched every episode once. Take THAT, Heroes.

Wednesday is even more exciting. Pushing Daisies begins at 8 on ABC (oh wonderful, amazing, sublime Pushing Daisies), the story of the Piemaker who cannot touch the woman he loves, or he'll kill her. I cannot WAIT for Olive to pine for Ned, for Emerson to say something completely hilarious, and for the aunts to break into song. I hope they haven't changed a THING, from the narrator to the music to the look of it. I'm DYING for the premiere of this show. Tune in... even if you haven't seen season 1, I know they're putting a big push on the show to get people to watch, and will probably do an extended "previously on..." segment (unlike Heroes).

At 10 it's Dirty Sexy Money, the adult version of Gossip Girl, with its convoluted politics, family dysfunctions, and money, money, money. It's SO freakin' good.

But also on at 8 on Wednesday is the brilliant, genius, and totally underrated Friday Night Lights. Fan support of this show has been SO loud that NBC, who just weren't making enough money off sponsorships because the ratings were so inexplicably low, actually struck a groundbreaking deal with DirecTV to help fund the show. Now DirectTV will air it this fall beginning on Wednesday, and NBC will air it in January. (Uh... I'll be downloading. Sorry, NBC, but I just can't wait. I'll make it back to you by buying the DVDs, like I always do.)

Here's hoping people tune in to see these shows and give them all the second (or in FNL's case, third) chance they all deserve. You won't be disappointed.

He's Back... and Bloody as Ever...

At the end of season 1 of Showtime's grisly and disturbing drama Dexter, I remember thinking, "Where can they go from here?" (Then my brain began humming the song from Buffy, and I lost my train of thought. It happens a little too often. Ahem.) Spoilers for anyone who hasn't yet watched Dexter's first two seasons: In season 1, we discover that his mother had been killed and Dexter had watched it happen, that her being chopped into chunky bloody bits by a chainsaw probably turned him into the sociopath he is today, that his adopted father realized his son was a sociopath so he "honed his skills" to use his powers for good, rather than evil.

And by good, that meant hacking the baddies into tiny little pieces. So, Dexter is a blood spatter expert in the forensics department of the Miami Police Department by day, doing his job but also checking records of cases where the perp got off, then by night hunting down said perp and slaughtering him. And remarkably, you actually end up cheering for Dexter. In season 1, by day he's after the Ice Truck Killer, who appears to be leaving him personal messages in his own serial killing, and Dexter eventually realizes it's his brother, who he kills at the end of the season. The problem is, his brother, like him, was also witness to their mother's murder, and also turned out like Dexter, but he didn't have Harry the dad to hone those "talents." So the problem became, how could he kill the guy who was just like him, in fact, the ONLY person who could possibly understand him, when it's not his brother's fault that he turned out like this?

In season 2, the police discover the bags of bodies that Dexter has been hiding in the Bay, and he becomes known as the Bay Harbour Butcher. By day he's actually doing the work on the case where he's the killer, and by night he's being REALLY careful about how he disposes of those bodies. Doakes, a detective on the force, knows Dex is up to no good, but his obsession with pinning the cases on Dexter eventually puts him in the spotlight, and he dies with the world believing HE was the Bay Harbour Butcher.

This series has a definite psychoanalytic feel about it, and if in season 1 Dexter mined his psyche to realize what Harry did for him, discover the brother who could have been him if not for Harry, and killed him, that's psychotherapy gold. I thought, there's no way they can have a season 2. And then season 2 was even better, with Dexter beginning to get hints that maybe Harry had had an affair with his mother, and... could Dexter have actually been his real son? The audience is given those clues, but Dex doesn't seem to have made that connection yet. He comes close to being found out, hooks up with a looney pyromaniac who discovers who he really is and eggs him on, and then pulls back at the end, killing her, Doakes, and covering up who he is once again. How could they have a season 3?

I've seen the first two episodes, and they're bloody brilliant (pun intended). Season 3 is shaping up to be my favourite one so far. If season 1 is us realizing who he is, and season 2 is Dexter maybe seeing who he's not and beginning to question Harry's methods, season 3 is looking at what Dexter's life might be like if he acted outside Harry's code. As Dexter hunts down one of his victims, things go slightly awry and he accidentally kills an innocent. Desperate to find out SOMETHING this guy has done wrong so he can tell himself that he really didn't do a terrible thing, Dexter begins crossing lines that put him once again in danger of being found out. The Rita storyline moves in an inevitable direction (I called it back in season 2), and this season's guest star is Jimmy Smits, one of those actors who could just sit on a chair staring at the wall and I'd be riveted. At the end of the second episode, the suspense builds in one scene to the point where I had both feet up on the couch and my hands over my mouth, suppressing a scream. It was awesome.

THIS is my new show that I can't wait to see week after week. Sorry, Heroes. So far you're just not cutting it.

"I'd like to use one of my lifelines..."

I used to love Tina Fey. Now I want to marry her. (But if Sarah Palin makes it into the White House, I guess THAT won't be happening...)

Last night's SNL opened once again with Palin, this time parodying the Katie Couric interview she stumbled through this week. Tina Fey might have left SNL, and Amy Poehler is on her way out, but here's hoping they keep coming back to reprise this. They've hit upon comedy GOLD.



Seriously, Sarah Palin interviews are quickly becoming must-see TV. Tina Fey doesn't actually make up a lot of what Palin says. She's becoming notorious for dodging questions by rambling so much she doesn't actually make any sense, thus baffling her interviewer into forgetting what they'd originally asked.

In the actual Katie Couric interview, when Couric asked her what she really means when she keeps mentioning Russia's proximity to Alaska, Couric responded:

“That Alaska has a very narrow maritime border between a foreign country, Russia, and on our other side, the land — boundary that we have with — Canada.”

When Couric pushed her on the point, asking if she's ever been involved in any foreign negotiations, she answered:

“We have trade missions back and forth,” said Ms. Palin. “We do. It’s very important when you consider even national security issues with Russia. As Putin rears his head and comes into the airspace of the United States of America, where do they go? It’s Alaska. It’s just right over the border. It is from Alaska that we send those out to make sure that an eye is being kept on this very powerful nation, Russia, because they are right there. They are right next to our state.”

As Bob Herbert of the NYT wrote, "It was surreal, the kind of performance that would generate a hearty laugh if it were part of a Monty Python sketch. But this is real life, and the stakes couldn’t be higher." He cautioned, rightfully so, "The alarm bells should be clanging and warning lights flashing. You wouldn’t put an unqualified pilot in the cockpit of a jetliner. The potential for catastrophe is far, far greater with an unqualified president."

Tired of Being Daphne...

It's been five long years since Sarah Michelle Gellar left our TV sets, when Buffy faded to black. But Variety is reporting that she's about to come back... to HBO of all places (read: won't be cancelled during the first season!) Sarah is set to film a pilot on a show called The Wonderful Maladys, penned by the guy who brought us The Interpreter and The Life of David Gale. Both of them mediocre films, but hey, maybe his TV writing will be better. (I seem to recall reading something at the time of The Interpreter saying they had to bring in two or three script doctors to clean the script considerably... I hope my memory is failing me on that one.)

The show will be about the lives of a trio of siblings who lost their parents at a young age. You can read the full article here. (Thanks to Crissy for the link!)

RIP: Paul Newman

1925-2008

Stuff for a Friday

The Rise of Queen S
This week's Gossip Girl totally rocked, as usual. I never thought I'd say this, but each week I find myself looking forward to GG more than just about any other show. This week was all about putting us back at the beginning, repositioning the characters on the chess board to restart the game, and hopefully, to watch it unfold over the next 20-odd episodes. Queen B was back on the front steps, interviewing the girls who will be in her posse; Vanessa will probably return to hating the richies; Rufus, who is trying to move on (NO, Rufus, NO, you and Lily were MEANT to be together!!), runs into Lily and realizes maybe it's not going to be as easy as he thought (WHEEE!); Dan returns to being the social pariah; Chuck Bass is behind the scenes orchestrating mischief; and Serena has taken back her mantle as Queen S, about to dethrone B and take over the school... The Bitch Is Back. Anyone notice Jenny seems to be the only one who's actually raised her status, even if it's just an inch? That said, she's also back to being the little girl being picked on by the richies.

Dan drove me NUTZOID in this episode, with his holier-than-thou attitude. God, he drove me nuts. I was thrilled to find out he was being played. He can tell Serena she's a terrible person who's rubbing this doofus in his face that she just picked up at a bar, and he can accuse her of being behind the Nairtini incident, but then who is HE talking about Rilke (like he could ever achieve THAT status) in front of her knowing it'll make her feel stupid and out of place, rubbing her nose in his new gal Amanda, and ADMITTING to Amanda on the phone the next morning that Serena wasn't behind her burning hair. After, of course, he blames it on Serena to her face and makes her feel an inch high.

Don't mess with Serena, Dan, because she will make your life MISERABLE. Here's hoping she does it for a long, long, long time. Bwooohahahaha!

Nitpick: While I wanted to clock Vanessa for butting in when B told her to keep out, did you notice the complete lack of chemistry between the Lord and the Duchess? He's as interesting as wood around B, and he seems to be... about that interesting around the Duchess. "Oh. Oh. Yes. Here, let me turn thee around. Oh, yes. That's the ticket. Yes." Complete ZERO sensuality in that scene. Blech. Let's hope B realized THAT is what awaits her should she and her lord ever get intimate.

For a great recap of the ep, check out my pal C's site.

9021... Oh, WHY?!
I've been meaning to post on the CW's new 90210 for a while now, but there is much better television to be written about. So here goes... now, I haven't given this show the shot I usually give other shows, but the first 2 hours were SO painful and derivative, I don't think it deserves a chance. (That said, my pal C DID stick with it, and she confirms my initial hatred is founded. VERY founded.) If you missed it, let me run through some of the more original things about the new series:

Naomi, the total elitist bitch of the school, is dating the school jock (really??) and finds out he's fooling around with other girls (no WAY! That's unheard-of in teen dramas) and she dumps him at a party, then has to endure the hostility from people who've been waiting eons to dump it on her. The actress, by the way, is TERRIBLE.

But not as bad as the one who plays the wholesome, good, wonderful, pure, heart-of-gold Annie (even the name reeks of stereotype), who comes from Kansas (in the reality the actress comes from Canada... sigh) who is JUST SO EXCITED!!!! to be coming to Beverly Hills with her... black adopted brother, played by Tristan Wilds. Now, for the three of you who actually watch The Wire, you'll know Wilds as Michael, the kid who worked his way up quickly through the ranks to a major, MAJOR player on the Baltimore streets. Here he's squeaky clean and just hoping people like him. Poor Tristan... he sold his soul to the devil on this one. He's gone from a complex, interesting, multi-layered role on the smartest series in television history to the token black kid on one of the dumbest. Each episode, just to try to reiterate the awesomeicity of their sibling relationship, Dixon and Annie have moments where they hang out in one or the other's bedroom and "share" their lives. "Oh my god, I LOVE you, Dixon, and you know, it shows what an open-minded, warm-hearted soul I am because I love my African-American adopted brother and I will help you be cool in school no matter where I go because THAT is the sort of person I AM!!" "Oh, Annie, I love you so much. You are the BEST adopted sister I could ever, ever have. And isn't it strange that dad's not speaking to me because I went behind his back and did that whole pig trick on the other school, and now mom's not speaking to you because you went behind her back and flew to San Fran with that guy you just met 15 minutes ago? It's like we are the SAME PERSON!!!"

Read between the lines, look at their faces, check out the COMPLETE lack of chemistry between these two actors, and all you hear is, "I HATE you, you dipshit." "Not as much as I hate you, heehee! And who the hell ever heard of The Wire? What, was it about trapeze artists or something?? Heehee!" "I. HATE. YOU."

Here's hoping this show gets cancelled so the immense talent of Tristan Wilds is wasted no longer. I hope if this show does one thing, it gets his name out there so he can have his choice of parts. But with the scripts they're giving him... who knows.

There's the principal who has two kids in the school but can't show favoritism.

There's the cool, hot English teacher who's a little too flirty with a couple of students but really has his eye on the guidance counsellor.

Brenda and Kelly are both back, and completely watered down from their former, vicious selves. I LOVED Brenda as the bitch, and the war between them over Dylan. Now Shannen Doherty is all, "I won't come back to the show if you make me fight over a guy," and I'm all, "Uh... that's exactly what this show NEEDS." Instead, English teacher comes over with his flowers, "Hey, uh, we couldn't go OUT or something, could we?" and Brenda appears at the door all, "Well, actually, if your little guy is asleep and all, I could TOTALLY watch him for you and you could go out and wouldn't that be fun and I'm such a good person to do this for you but I was always a good person and the writers were just totally unfair to me making me out to be a total bitch and I'm not and I just want the world to know this and Brenda is BACK baby but she's different and... um... yeah, did you want to go out then??"

There has been a single funny line: Andrea Zuckerman's kid does this morning news show at the school, and the English teacher looks up at her and says, "Man, she looks like she's 30." HAHA! That was worth suffering through the 2 initial hours.

But no more. That zip code has been tarnished. Please let this go off the air before they ruin it further.

Aural Holocaust
Last night I did NOT, in fact, watch The Office (more goodies for me on the weekend!!) but instead went downtown to see the reunited My Bloody Valentine at Kool Haus in Toronto. For those kidlets among you who may be too young to remember MBV (wow, I felt old typing that... let me retry.) For those of you who just aren't cool enough to know who MBV are (that felt better), they were the purveyors of the early 90s shoegazing scene, which was concurrent with the Manchester Dance scene. Bands like The Cure count them among the bands that have shaped or influenced them, but no one -- despite bands like Ride trying REALLY hard -- has been able to come close to sounding anything like them. Kevin Shields, the guy who writes all the songs, is the lead guitarist, and sings (in the pic he's the top right) ironically has one of the most delicate ears in music. Legend has it they were recording once and he was distracted by a telephone ringing. When people told him there wasn't a phone in the building, they realized it was coming from half a block away. He can hear everything, every tiny nuance, every minute detail. The reason I say his delicate hearing is ironic is because they're arguably the world's loudest band.

Their seminal record, Loveless, was released in 1991, and I listened to it CONSTANTLY, at very, very high volumes. Listening to it again recently, I found it a little tinny and it didn't hold up to more recent albums that can make the windows shake on my car if I crank the stereo past 30. People lobbied for Shields to remaster the album and rerelease it, making it louder, so he spent eons working on it, it's out, and by most accounts... there's barely anything different. Problem with having acute hearing is if you add in a tiny chime or nuance, NO ONE knows it's there but you.

MBV played Toronto only once. It was in 1993, I believe. I was 19. The story of Kevin's new sound that he'd just discovered had preceded their Toronto appearance, but only if you paid close attention to the British music mags, which my then-boyfriend, now-husband, and I, devoured. The story goes that Shields was experimenting with decibel levels, and had discovered a single decibel that is almost intolerable to the human ear. One decibel above it is so loud we can tune parts of it out, and one decibel below it is too low to be annoying. But this one particular decibel level is so wretched that it can actually cause negative physical reactions in the listener. Right before coming to Toronto, MBV played the Reading Festival. During their song, "You Made Me Realize," the band suddenly hit this decibel and held it (they all wear super-duty earplugs). The result was legendary. Audience members began vomiting, going into fits, running from the stage screaming for people to get away from the amps. Shields and Co. held the note. The grounds began to clear, people were trying to find ways to make the sound stop... MBV held the note. They held it for just over nine minutes, and it was enough to pretty much clear the place out.

My husband and I had discovered our challenge, and we were ready to meet it.

We went to the Toronto show, one of about 400 or 500 people crammed into a really small bar (I can't remember the name of it, but Mercury Rev and Buffalo Tom were on the same bill). We had our earplugs, which the British mags said would take the edge off. We were prepared for 10 minutes of agony, and we were going to defeat it.

The band played their typically short set, about 45 minutes, and then went into You Made Me Realize. The earplugs were already in, but we madly adjusted them. And then... they hit the note. It was like a sonic boom had gone off in the place. It was mind-numbing... literally. My husband and I pressed our hands to our ears as hard as we could, trying to keep out the sound, but it doesn't just affect your ears, it hits the very core of your body. Soon people began wretching and vomiting up next to the stage. People were stampeding to get away from the speakers. We were standing far enough away, up on a riser near the bar, where the assault wouldn't be quite as vicious. The note held. We quickly checked watches. Ten minutes. We were past Reading. More people began running. Bouncers were waving arms and telling people there would be no re-entry. People ran anyway.

They held the note for 17 and a half minutes. At the end, it was the two of us and four other people, also wearing earplugs and jamming their fingers into their ears. Shields and Co. looked up, realized they'd emptied the place, and that was that. I seem to remember another song after that, and a few stragglers who'd been hiding in the bathroom came back out.

We wore that night as a badge of gig-going honour for 15 years, and then last night they were back, reunited for the first time in eons. Earplugs in hand, we were ready again. But now I'm in my 30s. It's a little more daunting... what if Shields had perfected it, made it worse? Could he?

He could.

The set was just under an hour (and it was pretty wicked, and LOUD). They gave out earplugs at the door, probably to release themselves from any liabilities. People were a little more prepared this time. The legend of the deafening note in You Made Me Realize had been floating around music geek circles for over a decade, and now people knew what to expect in a way they couldn't have in 1993.

The band began playing You Made Me Realize. I stuck my fingers into my already earplugged ears. They played two verses and then the chorus, and then WHAM, they hit the note.

You know those old movies from the 1950s where you see an A-bomb test in the desert, and surrounding the mushroom cloud is that ripple on the ground that shoots out, pretty much disintegrating everything in its path? That's kind of what it's like. The sound flies out of the amps like a physical thing and as a wave I watched everyone's heads reel back as it hit them one by one. The hair on my arms was standing on end. The hair on my head felt like it was blowing. I saw numerous people clutch their heads as if wondering why it felt so weird, but when I looked around, no one's hair was actually blowing. I do believe it was probably all standing on end. My heart felt like its beat was changing. My whole body shook. People had their arms up like they were descending a giant hill on a rollercoaster ride.

At the 10-minute mark, people began leaving. Not many, but mostly the people next to the stage and speakers. At 15 minutes, the crowd was thin enough that I thought, "hey, I can actually see now!" (Bilinda Butcher looked fabulous, by the way.) At 20 minutes, we thought, "Twenty minutes?!" A few minutes later, more people left. At 25 minutes, I thought, "What if he never ends?"

In total, it lasted 28 minutes by our count. We lasted until the end, and suddenly Butcher and Shields lurched forward and the song rocked into its ending, which we now knew was the end of the set (they no longer play songs after, if they ever did).

Are we crazy? Maybe. It's not a pleasant feeling, I'll give it that, but it's a feeling unlike anything you've ever experienced, so it's worth it. If you have earplugs. My husband, the warrior, thought he'd go a couple of songs without them. Today I have to shout things to him because the ringing in his ears is so bad he can't hear me. Great. Now he's got a NEW excuse for not putting out the garbage when I ask him to.

If you're not familiar with MBV, and don't want that aural assault, grab a copy of Loveless. Even if it doesn't have enough bass on it to hold up to newer discs, it's still pretty frickin' amazing.

Reminder: Set Those PVRs!

Just a quick note to make sure y'all remember tonight is the big season premiere of The Office! I am SO excited... this show is what makes my summers long these days. Also premiering tonight is Ugly Betty. Last season was pretty excellent, so as long as she's dropped that dead weight of Henry for good, I'm happy. Go Gio!!

Heroes Season 3 Opener

First, some background for those of you who are newer to this blog. I loved season 1 of Heroes. LOVED IT. Until the ending... that was one of the worst hours of television I'd ever seen, simply because it was such a huge letdown after such an incredible season. (I rant about it in the book Saving the World: A Guide to Heroes, arguing against the great TV writer David Lavery, who liked it.)

Then came season 2. I hoped the finale had been a fluke... but apparently it was simply a nod toward the new direction of the show: which was SUCKSVILLE. New heroes included the DunderTwins from Mexico, a girl who could double-dutch or fashion roses out of tomatoes (seriously, THAT was her superpower), and Mohinder, who was seriously hot and sort of sympathetic throughout season 1 became Moronder, the numbskull who was forcing his father to spin in his grave like a freakin' gyroscope. Nikessica was even more irritating than she'd been in season 1. And NO ONE who died actually stayed dead, which was annoying. I thought maybe Veronica Mars could save the show, but uh uh... she'd turned down Lost to be on the more popular show, and didn't realize how much the writing would rot when she got there.

But then something interesting happened. Tim Kring, the series creator, came out with a mea culpa in EW, saying yeah, Hiro had been in Japan too long, and no, the new romances weren't working out, and yeah, some of it was just too stupid and drawn-out and no, they hadn't really worked through the new heroes to come up with anyone interesting. I'd never seen a TV bigwig admit anything like that. Usually an executive would blame the audience for not understanding their vision (especially with Kring, who responded to mass criticism of the season 1 finale with the outrageous, "Oh yeah?? Well... you guys were just expecting too much! It's YOUR fault for not lowering your expectations!"), but Kring confessed his vision had sort of gone south and he was kinda out of ideas. This guy who'd been making snide remarks about Lost dragging out mysteries had now realized that when you show all your cards, you've got nuthin for a second season. The final 2 or 3 episodes that followed this mess were really, really good, and gave everyone hope that maybe things would change. The Writer's Strike hit, and Heroes never returned. NBC shelved their very big plans and allowed Kring to go away and reimagine the show.

And now, season 3 is here. Problem is, season 2 happened so long ago and I'd lost interest so much that I couldn't remember where everyone was in the story. So I recorded the hour-long "Heroes: Countdown to the Premiere" that NBC aired leading into the 2-hour return, thinking they would catch me up, but instead it was the entire cast standing in Times Square mugging for the cameras, with lots of fans standing on the street behind barriers screaming in frantic enthusiasm for the show. It made NBC and Heroes look RIDICULOUS. Apparently this show they'd put so much stake in has fallen so far they had to create this fictional mania for the return to make it look like it was important and relevant again. Instead of recapping season 2, we watched Masi Oka stand there going, "I'M STANDING HERE WITH FANS OF HEROES, AND ALL I HAVE TO SAY IS, SAVE THE CHEERLEADER, SAVE THE WORLD!!!" cut to a bunch of girls dressed as cheerleaders. UGH. "I'M HAYDEN PANETTIERE AND YOU KNOW, I LOVE BEING ON HEROES!" "I'm Greg Grunberg and..." "HA! I'm Adrian Pasdar stealing the mike from Greg, you rascal..." "Oh yeah?? You're such a funny guy!"

And on and on and on... Stupidity.

FINALLY, I got to the premiere. Absolutely no "previously on Heroes," so I'll admit I was lost for part of it (there's Maia, what happened to her brother again? did he die or run away?... wait, why is Bennet in the cell? Who caught him?... what happened to Adam? Have we left him somewhere? why isn't he in this episode?)

But I have to say, I was pleasantly entertained for the 2 hours. Nothing mindblowing, but it's off to a good start, and I'm keen to see more. Some fave moments:
-Veronica Mars and Weevil, reunited
-Hiro and Ando watching the DVD of his dad, then opening the safe, and then the dad saying on the prerecorded message, "I told you not to open the safe!!"
-the speedster! It was awesome to see Jean from Friday Night Lights again (I TOLD you not to dump her, Landry, you tool.)
-the future standoff with Claire and Peter
-Sylar looking through Claire's brain
-Claire asking if Sylar was going to eat her brain and him expressing his disgust
-the creepy guy Parkman runs into in the desert (and him talking to the turtle)

What I didn't like:
-Mohinder still bugged me. "Oh hey, I just met you, but HERE is where I keep my precious, super-secret USB drive with ALL of the secrets my father worked a lifetime to keep, so if you ever need it, it's right here!" Were we supposed to take his rant as being sort of NRA agenda vs. Maia's non-NRA agenda? (The idea that if we ALL had guns, we'd be much safer, not realizing the people who we should be scared of probably have bigger and worse guns than we do... similarly Mohinder says he could inject his new formula into people and they could all be superheroes, despite the fact he KNOWS that the only ones who would want it are those who could do bad with it.) He's SO going to turn out to be a baddie. I'm kinda glad he's scaling or whatever that gross stuff was.
-I didn't get why they showed Milo Ventimiglia at the end instead of Francis Capra. Yeah, we get it, Peter's trapped inside Jesse's body, but everyone can see Jesse, not Peter, so why have Milo play the scene? That was really confusing.

Could someone explain to me what Sylar did with Claire's brain? Did I miss something or were we not supposed to see it?

Your thoughts?

HBO Canada!

I meant to post on this yesterday but I'm only getting a chance to do so now. (This will only be interesting to my Canadian readers, but there are a lot of you out there, eh?)

TMN has announced that the channel previously known as M-More will be switching to HBO Canada, which is all-HBO programming. (Of course, under current regulations, 30% must be Canadian, but that's not a bad thing.) This means that new HBO series in the U.S. will be debuting date and time with the Canadian channel, rather than airing there first. Now, the thing is, TMN already gets almost all of the HBO shows, so it's not like we can yell, "Hooray! Now we finally get Entourage!! Uh..." For shows airing right now, such as Entourage, True Blood, etc. that are currently premiering on M, they'll continue to stay on that channel while also being broadcast on HBO Canada (as I put it to the publicist when I talked to her, "So I don't have to reprogram my PVR?") until the current crop of shows are finished.

What intrigues me most about this channel is the older stuff they'll be showing. They'll be reaching into the "HBO library" as they put it, and re-airing series such as Oz or Da Ali G Show from the beginning. They'll be showing HBO documentaries and movies. While these aired on TMN at one time, they don't air any longer, so it'll be nice to see some of them again.

Here is my hope for this new programming. By putting all of the HBO series onto this one channel, it opens up the other channels for new programming. Maybe TMN can start looking to buy more things from other cable channels in the U.S. that aren't easily available here: Mad Men, Breaking Bad, The Shield (Global has done a LOUSY job airing this show something like 6 months after it airs in the U.S.), Damages, etc. TMN has always done a much better job in getting the U.S. programming to coincide with the airing in the U.S. (see not only the HBO series but Dexter, Californication, etc.), rather than all the spoilers getting out so by the time we watch it, it's old news. Maybe they could fit a reality show in there, like, mm... Project Runway? I was SO annoyed last season that I knew Christian was going to win 5 episodes before it ended here, ARGH.

Anyway, this is fun news for now, but here's hoping it opens up the remaining channels to bring us even more intriguing news of pick-ups in the future.

Stuff for a Monday

So much to say, so little time. When I'm not back at work I'm rushing to get dinner ready and then it's helping my daughter with her homework (in junior kindergarten?? Has the world gone COMPLETELY crazy??) and then getting the duo to bed and then working on Lost. Uh... wait, is there TV I'm supposed to be watching??

Heroes is on RIGHT NOW and I'm working on the Lost book. Argh. Here's hoping I can watch it soon. I'm behind on Gossip Girl, but last week's ep TOTALLY rocked. Loved it. I love Chuck Bass as much as I hated Edward in Twilight, and yet they're both jerks. Maybe it's because Chuck doesn't hide the fact he's a dick, and Edward's dickishness is something we're not supposed to notice.

I've seen the first episode of The Shield, and it's brilliant. (K, you must watch so we can discuss!) LOVE this show.

The Emmys were last night, and I was pleasantly surprised to see a new guard stepping up. 30 Rock won best comedy, which is great, Mad Men won best drama... I just finished season 1 and am beginning season 2, and I really love it. Connor Peter is a bit of a caricature, but that's what makes him funny. I still love how enamoured he was of the chip and dip in season one -- "The chips go here and in the middle it's this sour cream concoction with little dried onion bits, and you DIP the chip in!" I said to my husband that I MUST find a chip dip holder that is that horrific-looking. I can't imagine a world where chip dip didn't exist. Good god.

I'm actually pretty happy with most of the awards last night, with the exception of one MAJOR one. Gabriel Byrne did not win for In Treatment. The man carried -- CARRIED -- 43 half-hours of a show in a single season, and was in virtually every scene. And he's absolutely brilliant in every scene. He ran the gamut of emotions in this show and I don't think I've ever seen a performance like his in a single season. If he HAD to lose, I would have accepted Michael C. Hall for Dexter, but he didn't win, either. It went to Bryan Cranston for Breaking Bad. I haven't seen it, and now I need to check it out because that better be one helluva groundbreaking performance to take down those two men. It just seems impossible.

Michael Emerson didn't win it for Lost, which sucks, but it went to Zeljko Ivanek for Damages, and I must admit, he's pretty freakin' amazing in that. (And hey, he's Juliet's bastard husband, and the guy's a character actor legend, so I'll let him have it without bitching too much.)

Maureen Dowd of the New York Times let Aaron Sorkin take over her column today and imagine a meeting between Barack Obama and Jed Bartlet. The result is pretty funny, even for the way over the top writing of Aaron Sorkin:

OBAMA They pivoted off the argument that I was inexperienced to the criticism that I’m — wait for it — the Messiah, who, by the way, was a community organizer. When I speak I try to lead with inspiration and aptitude. How is that a liability?

BARTLET Because the idea of American exceptionalism doesn’t extend to Americans being exceptional. If you excelled academically and are able to casually use 690 SAT words then you might as well have the press shoot video of you giving the finger to the Statue of Liberty while the Dixie Chicks sing the University of the Taliban fight song. The people who want English to be the official language of the United States are uncomfortable with their leaders being fluent in it.

OBAMA You’re saying race doesn’t have anything to do with it?

BARTLET I wouldn’t go that far. Brains made me look arrogant but they make you look uppity. Plus, if you had a black daughter —

OBAMA I have two.

BARTLET — who was 17 and pregnant and unmarried and the father was a teenager hoping to launch a rap career with “Thug Life” inked across his chest, you’d come in fifth behind Bob Barr, Ralph Nader and a ficus.

OBAMA You’re not cheering me up.

BARTLET Is that what you came here for?

OBAMA No, but it wouldn’t kill you.

BARTLET Have you tried doing a two-hour special or a really good Christmas show?

OBAMA Sir —

BARTLET Hang on. Home run. Right here. Is there any chance you could get Michelle pregnant before the fall sweeps?

OBAMA The problem is we can’t appear angry. Bush called us the angry left. Did you see anyone in Denver who was angry?

BARTLET Well ... let me think. ...We went to war against the wrong country, Osama bin Laden just celebrated his seventh anniversary of not being caught either dead or alive, my family’s less safe than it was eight years ago, we’ve lost trillions of dollars, millions of jobs, thousands of lives and we lost an entire city due to bad weather. So, you know ... I’m a little angry.

OBAMA What would you do?

BARTLET GET ANGRIER! Call them liars, because that’s what they are. Sarah Palin didn’t say “thanks but no thanks” to the Bridge to Nowhere. She just said “Thanks.” You were raised by a single mother on food stamps — where does a guy with eight houses who was legacied into Annapolis get off calling you an elitist? And by the way, if you do nothing else, take that word back. Elite is a good word, it means well above average. I’d ask them what their problem is with excellence. While you’re at it, I want the word “patriot” back. McCain can say that the transcendent issue of our time is the spread of Islamic fanaticism or he can choose a running mate who doesn’t know the Bush doctrine from the Monroe Doctrine, but he can’t do both at the same time and call it patriotic. They have to lie — the truth isn’t their friend right now. Get angry. Mock them mercilessly; they’ve earned it. McCain decried agents of intolerance, then chose a running mate who had to ask if she was allowed to ban books from a public library. It’s not bad enough she thinks the planet Earth was created in six days 6,000 years ago complete with a man, a woman and a talking snake, she wants schools to teach the rest of our kids to deny geology, anthropology, archaeology and common sense too? It’s not bad enough she’s forcing her own daughter into a loveless marriage to a teenage hood, she wants the rest of us to guide our daughters in that direction too? It’s not enough that a woman shouldn’t have the right to choose, it should be the law of the land that she has to carry and deliver her rapist’s baby too? I don’t know whether or not Governor Palin has the tenacity of a pit bull, but I know for sure she’s got the qualifications of one. And you’re worried about seeming angry? You could eat their lunch, make them cry and tell their mamas about it and God himself would call it restrained. There are times when you are simply required to be impolite. There are times when condescension is called for!

OBAMA Good to get that off your chest?

It's REALLY funny stuff. Read the entire thing here. (Thanks to CJ for the link!)

Speaking of the election, if you've seen the Sarah Palin interview on ABC that sparked Tina Fey's impression of her, you'll love this straight parody of the interview (even better, watch the Palin interview right before it and you'll see that they're playing the parody really close and not making much up).



I read with my jaw sort of on the floor today the news that Jamie-Lynn Spears' baby daddy took pictures of her with the new baby, and in one pic she's breastfeeding it and you can see part of her left breast. When the guy took the pics to Wal-Mart to get them developed, an employee looked through them, saw the pic of the boobie, and immediately tried to sell it to the papers. It's gone missing, and an investigation is underway saying if that is published it's tantamount to child porn because of Jamie-Lynn's age (I am SO not making this up). Which led me to this thought: What's worse, the fact a low-life photo developer tried to pawn off pictures of a new mother while she was simply trying to feed her baby, or the fact that Mr. Jamie-Lynn Spears TOOK HIS PICTURES TO WAL-MART to get them developed???

Dude: GET A DIGITAL CAMERA.

UPDATE: I'm being told it was a memory card that he took to Wal-Mart, which actually doesn't change my shock at his stupidity. Did he really need to save money on processing those photos? Couldn't he have found a more discreet retailer, a photo developer to the stars or something? You can't tell me Jennifer Garner is taking her baby pics to Wal-Mart for developing.

Finding Lost: Season 4

And here is my new cover!



I hope you like it. I gave the designer a pretty tall order: "I'd like a pocket watch like the White Rabbit on Alice but I want it to show two times happening at once (so I need two hour hands, two minute hands, two second hands), a pic of the Tunisian desert, with the I Ching symbol buried in the sand, and Hurley's numbers hidden somewhere on there."

And she pulled it off!

Fringe 1.02: The Same Old Story

Last week I had a lot going on, and with my husband being away and not getting any other help, I found myself up late every night cleaning, getting my daughter's things ready for school the next day, getting my son's things ready for the nanny the next day, and then waking up at 5:20 because my son was teething and decided that's the new "up time," as my daughter would put it.

Needless to say, this week I am exhausted.

So last night I finished up the work I was doing on the Lost book (something I thought I would finish on Sunday but instead took me Sunday, Monday night, and Tuesday night) and came down to grab one thing and then go to bed. The TV had been left on, and the PVR clicked in to record Fringe. I stood in the kitchen, which faces the living room, and watched the opening sequence of the woman, the race to the hospital, and the... thing. And by the time the opening credits started, I was already out of the kitchen, butt firmly planted on couch, and I didn't move for the rest of the show.

I thought last night's episode was even better than the first. We didn't have to worry about all that exposition this time, and instead got to focus on a fascinating corner of science: rapid mitosis. How could a woman get pregnant, grow the baby to full term, give birth, and have the baby age to an 80-year-old man, all within about an hour? If JJ Abrams is to be believed (he says that all science seen on the show is real and currently studied) then apparently it could happen... theoretically, as Walter would say.

While I'm not watching this show as closely as I am Lost when it's on, I'm already intrigued enough to be looking around to see if I'm missing anything or if there are any clues. I'm assuming Jabrams is putting a lot of things in there for us to find... At the end, where you see the three bodies, are those clones of Christopher? Could there be other rapidly aging men around? I noticed when Walter was trying to put himself to sleep he was reciting the Fibonacci sequence, something that came up on Alias and was only really on Lost insofar as a mention in The Lost Experience.

There was one cut back from a commercial break where you could see someone has pasted the letters to spell VOCES VIDEO on a one-way sign outside the building. I wonder if that's a clue? Or maybe it's a subtle way of mentioning two of the five senses that will help Olivia on her search. Voces means voices, so she must listen, and video refers to seeing, so she must look.

I'm still liking Joshua Jackson a lot, his laid-back, rather annoyed persona where he keeps a monotone when he talks and pretends to be aloof, but when he is able to help out or finds something important, you can sense the excitement in him.

I'm assuming Claus Penrose will be playing a larger role in upcoming episodes.

What did you think about it? Better than the first week? Did you catch any Easter eggs?

"It's Just God Hugging Us Closer"

One of the first things I thought when I saw Sarah Palin was, "Wow, she REALLY looks like Tina Fey!" I wasn't the only one. Everyone's been making that comparison. Thankfully, this past Saturday, Tina Fey indulged us all by doing a pitch-perfect caricature of Palin to open this season's SNL, and it was genius.

You can watch the clip here.

It was a brilliant way to show what The Daily Show has been playing up for the past week: that the appointment of Sarah Palin to John McCain's running mate and the accusations of "Sexism!!" coming from the Republican camp is just highlighting one of the major cornerstones of that party: their love of the double standard. They mock Hillary Clinton for being a woman, but glare and wag their fingers with a dour, "For SHAME!" if anyone levies the same comments at Palin. Karl Rove, as Jon Stewart pointed out, blasted Obama's running mate because he was formerly the mayor of the "small town" of Richmond, Virginia (pop. 200,000) and says that anyone who has that in their background is just showing irresponsibility and a complete lack of credentials for the job, yet when Palin was appointed (mayor of huge town, pop. 9,000) he said she was perfect for the job.

With hypocrisy being of utmost importance within that party, Palin is the candidate for them. I particularly love how she touts her "choice" to have her baby even when she knew he had Down's, or her daughter's "choice" to go through with her own teen pregnancy, while vowing to remove that choice from any other women should she win.

But enough about Palin: Please tell me you saw Jon Stewart's comparisons between Foghorn Leghorn and Senator Fred Thompson, and Droopy Dog and Sen. Joe Lieberman. I was doubled over laughing. It was BRILLIANT. (I'd post the clip, but it's been taken down everywhere.)

UPDATE: I've got the clip! (Thanks, Memphish, for the US clip!) If you're in the U.S., you can watch it here, and in Canada, here. Watch the entire thing; the lead-up to the cartoon character bit is just as funny.

XOXO

It's my 500th blog post! Cue the music, roll out the carpet, here we go (make it count, Nik!)

So... um. *Cough.* Uh...

Oh right, new TV season! Well, the PVR is filling up (my husband promised to get us the new upgraded 200-hour model with HD on it in August, and I still don't have it, so I'm hoping we get it soon before all the new shows have debuted). I've watched a few shows and since I'm used to writing books through the spring to come out in the fall, let's just say I'm finding this new TV season FAR too tempting right now!

Gossip Girl. Still love. So much love. I wondered if the English lord was a little too over-the-top, but my pal Calhouner assures me it's actually in the books (which are apparently pretty terrible). I think the scene in the first episode when he transitioned mid-sentence from American to a sort of bad British accent was a little laughable, but it's fun watching Blair's complete shallowness with it all. She couldn't stand him before, and now that he has a hot accent and is in line for the throne (even if he's 530th), she's hooked.

Serena and Dan are back together, and it's a little boringsville, but that's more than made up for by Chuck and Blair together. Rawr! I love those two. Chuck's such a dick, but he's funny, and the tension comes from these two former comrades-in-arms who go so far back and now he's chasing her and she won't follow. (This week's episode promises to up the stakes in the fireworks department between those two.) I can't get enough of them.

Best two lines so far: Blair telling Chuck to give her one good reason why she should stay with him, and adding, "And 'I'm Chuck Bass' doesn't count."
Blair finding Nate and the Duchess together on the floor and saying, "OH MY EFFING GOD."

Rufus finally returned last week and I was a little unnerved to see Vanessa all crushing on him. Ew? Get away, Jailbait, Rufus is MINE. I felt a little bad for her character this season though... it's like they needed to find a way to insert her, so they put her in a little cafe being all lonely and longing for ANYONE to drop by to talk to her.

All in all, I'm thrilled to be back on Manhattan's Upper East Side. It was a boring summer without them.

Fringe: The Pilot

[no real spoilers for anyone who hasn't yet watched]:
Earlier this year, a colleague of mine whose book (on Lost!!) I am editing right now emailed me about a new show called Fringe. "This will become your new obsession," she wrote, and she'd already gotten the inside scoop from the producers of the show, whom she knows.

After the first episode, I can say, yep, you just might be right, my friend.

As a longtime fan of J.J. Abrams, I could see his earlier work in there, and that's what made the show seem instantly familiar to me. Michael Giacchino's score, complete with those strings that rise to that eerily high pitch and suddenly screech to a halt right before a commercial break, just on Lost. The tongue in cheek humour with the production, like where they show the names of the places in front of the actual place, and the camera moves through one of the letters like it's actually there and not digitally overlaid (ok, that's also borrowed from Heroes). The fast-paced twists and cliffhangers, like on Alias. The borrowing from the cast of Oz (hello, Alvarez!!) Oh, and Matthew Abaddon's here, too. And he's a real S.O.B.

The opening scene is gory and grotesque. I could handle it to a point, but when the bottom of the co-pilot's face fell off... well... I was a little worried my dinner would make an unexpected reappearance. However, that horrific jolt is needed to make the situation of Olivia's lover more tenuous throughout. The show had great moments of humour (when Charlie walks into the lab and says, not asks, "Is that a cow." his delivery made me laugh out loud).

I loved the effects when Olivia stepped into the dreamscape, and the colour throughout made it feel very other-worldly... a little X-Filesy in places, actually. I adore Joshua Jackson. I was never a Dawson's fan, but he was always the best part of the few episodes I saw, and I think he's fantastic in everything I've seen him in since, so it's great to have him back on television. The tension between he and Olivia is clearly going to be a focus of the show. The twists were fun, and I'm definitely looking forward to the next episode.

Spoiler (highlight to see): I knew the lover was going to die somehow, though, because he needed to be out of the way so that we could have that sexual tension between Olivia and Pacey, but I really didn't see the WAY he died coming. Kinda sucks, though, doesn't it? That you somehow survive your skin becoming translucent and your body liquefying, and then die a few hours later in a stinkin' car crash. THAT would be annoying. My major objection to this episode would be his very fast recovery from what had happened to him. From what we saw on the place, people liquefied and died within seconds, yet he survives, becomes translucent, and a simple blood transfusion restores him to almost perfect health, with the exception of a few veins on his face? A little too hokey. But hey, I'm still in.

If you haven't yet watched it, the pilot will re-air this weekend. If you did, what did you think?

I'm Not Dead . . . Really

Hey y'all. The TV season is well underway, and I have barely posted a thing. What is WRONG with me, you might ask? (And have been asking, if my email inbox is any indication.) Well... it's my daughter's first week in junior kindergarten, it's her first week with a new daycare, it's my son's first week with his new nanny, and my first week back to work after a year of maternity leave. Oh, and her first week at dance class (she's SO cute in a little pink leotard! This is very weird to me, because I was never into that frou-frou dance stuff as a child; I have all the grace of a newly born calf.)

And to add to all that, despite my earlier statement that I'd be writing a season 4/5 combined Lost book for fall 2009, I'm actually going to write a season 4 book after all, and have been spending my evenings madly writing. ACK!

Please stay tuned for reviews of Fringe, Gossip Girl, 90210, etc.

But in the meantime, I audibly gasped when I saw this news item this morning, and since then three people have sent it to me, so I thought I'd post. Joss Whedon has halted production on Dollhouse, claims there's "nothing to see here, people, just go about your day," and that he's simply reviewing scripts and production.

Uh... Firefly, anyone?

Oh please, Fox, do NOT eff this one up. I'm beggin' ya.

UPDATE: I meant to spark discussion on Joss Whedon, and it seems more people are talking about my book! (Thank you, by the way!) I have a cover for it, so I'll try to get it up soon and see what y'all think.

Sunday Nights on TMN: Must-See TV

Do you remember the golden years of Fox Sunday nights? The Simpsons, King of the Hill, X-Files... there was no night like it on TV. Well, Sunday nights are back, and it's on The Movie Network. This Sunday will see the premieres of HBO's new vampire series, True Blood, and the fifth season of HBO's Entourage. They will be joined on September 28th by Showtime's Dexter. I think y'all know where I'll be on that night.
True Blood is the new show by Alan Ball, he of the legendary Six Feet Under and American Beauty. The series is based on the Sookie Stackhouse novels by Charlaine Harris, which are a funny and original take on the vampire myth (unlike Twilight, ahem). Because of a new synthetic blood that is very similar to the real thing, marketed as Tru Blood and sold in six-packs like beer, vampires are finally able to "come out of the coffin," and walk amongst us. They no longer have to hunt humans (not that the nastier ones don't still like to) and instead can survive on the synthetic blood. But there's a twist. The vampire legend states that vamps drink human blood to feel more alive and energetic, and can imbibe some of the soul of the person they drink. In True Blood, if a human drinks vampire blood, it can energize them, heighten their sex drive, and even heal them if they're sick or hurt. So now it's the VAMPIRES who are on the run from the nastier humans. And as we all know, there are a LOT of those around.

Sookie is portrayed by Anna Paquin, who won the Academy Award for her role in The Piano when she was a young girl (I think she was 11? I can't quite remember, but I do remember her up on the stage in a little purple velvet outfit and this adorable poofy hat, and she kept giggling instead of giving her acceptance speech, and finally in a Kiwi accent said, "I'd like to thank the Academy" and launched into a very mature speech). Here she's a southern belle who can read people's minds, and occasionally the noise around her turns into what Buffy was hearing on Earshot... so many people talking she can barely keep her head straight. She's learned to control it by stopping where she is, closing her eyes, and concentrating, but sometimes it gets the better of her. When a vampire walks into the restaurant/bar where she works, she's fascinated by him because she can't read his mind, and by looking at him it can turn the other voices off. HIs name is Bill (which earns a guffaw from her, saying she'd expected something a little more romantic) and he's from the Civil War. Stephen Moyer plays Bill with a gentlemanly air, since the last time he walked among humans he was opening doors for ladies in hoop skirts. It's a great premise, watching him try to talk to Sookie, who is in short shorts and a tight t-shirt, chomping on her gum, while he's using old-fashioned language and trying to figure out how to communicate with her.

Sookie's brother Jason is a vampire hater, as are a lot of people, and he's about as horny as vampires are fangy. Sookie's grandmother, on the other hand, is fascinated by them, and wants to hear about stories from the Civil War, which is her favourite historical era. The show is light, funny, and there are some genuinely scary moments. Each episode ends on a massive cliffhanger that keeps you guessing until the next week (and since I've seen the first two, I need to wait until the 21st to see how this one's going to be resolved!). Someone commented here that the only reason I didn't like Twilight is because it wasn't Buffy, and I'll never like a vampire story that's not Buffy, but in fact, Twilight is possibly the only vampire story I didn't like. True Blood, on the other hand, is everything Twilight isn't: funny, sensual, alluring, and great storytelling.

To get your funny bone in the mood for True Blood, Entourage returns with season 5. The first episode is a bit of a transition, cleaning up the mess we ended with in season 4 and getting us prepared for the new adventures of our favourite hangers-on. Vincent and E's disastrous Medellin has garnered reviews previously saved up for Vincent Gallo, and Vince has disappeared to Mexico to grow a shaggy beard, forget about the world around him, and get lots of chicks. Turtle has remained there with him, since he has nothing better to do than help lure in the women using his famous friend. Just as Vincent is about to turn into Billy, the horrible director who got him in this spot in the first place, E and Ari show up with an offer that will bring him back to L.A. But it's upon his return that he really sees what Medellin has done to his career.

We've watched E do everything in his power to save Vincent and keep Drama and Turtle at bay while Vincent just ignores him and does his own thing, and usually in the end, Vincent proves things work out if you're charming. But this is one time when Vincent is jolted awake, and when he finally decides to get serious about saving his career, Ari forces him to recognize it just might be too late. Vincent needs to smarten up FAST or all his roles will be taken by Emile Hirsch.

The show still has its zing, and while I'm sure some critics will complain about the samey premise, I love coming back to these guys. Drama still has an ego too big for his apartment; Turtle is still a loser; E is still trying to get some respect from ANYONE; and Ari is still one forehead vein away from a massive coronary. But by the end of the second episode, Ari's wake-up call just might have been enough for Vincent. As Ari yells to him in the closest thing he has to a motivational speech: "It's time for a comeback, Vince! And since Britney Spears fucked hers up, it's all down to you!!"

This season promises guest stars (Leighton Meester, aka Blair from Gossip Girl, guests in the second episode, as does Tony Bennett), heated-up rivalries, humour from the fallout of Medellin (a clip from Richard Roeper ripping it to shreds is hysterical), and more Johnny Drama. For what the future holds and whether or not this season will be worth it, I have just this to say -- Episode 4: Johnny guests on The View. 'Nuff said.

Entourage premieres Sunday, September 7 at 7:30pm on Movie Central and 8:30pm on TMN, and True Blood follows at 8pm on Movie Central and 9pm on TMN.