Stuff for a Wednesday

I keep meaning to post on this, but then I forget again... I assume I have a gist of what new music is out there. My husband and brother are complete musos, so of course I can't compete with them (as my brother constantly reminds me) but I do typically know what's out there, especially on my home turf. My husband is a music writer for a large music publication, so our house is constantly bombarded with truckloads of CDs and DVDs. One day I saw sitting in his pile this DVD for a band called Moneen. I'd never heard of them, but after some googling, I discovered they've been around for a couple of years and have a fairly devoted following. I felt out of the loop.

But then I turned over the DVD and began looking at song titles, and imagine my shock when one of them was called, "Don't Tell Locke What He Can't Do." I madly opened the packaging and popped it in... and the song doesn't seem to have anything to do with Lost or Locke beyond the title. Which might actually be even cooler... I just haven't decided yet. The band sounds a bit like the UK's Muse, and when I googled "Moneen and Lost" I found this great discussion where people were trying to find hidden Lost meaning in the lyrics. Go here for more info on the band.


So, are you one of the ones who hasn't bought a single season of The Sopranos, because you'd rather save some money to buy the entire box set? Think again. HBO just announced the box set will come out with a price tag of $400. Unbelievable. Go to Costco and grab some of them up; they're usually about $40 each there. (While you're at it, grab The Wire AND WATCH IT... it's currently $25 a season!) Also, keep an eye on it... it'll be offered for less elsewhere.


I have a confession. I am totally, completely, head over heels in love with So You Think You Can Dance. My pals CC and SD encouraged me to watch it last season, and I actually started to like it, even though I only saw the last 6 episodes. (I wanted the guy to win, but c'est la vie.) I really disliked Mary on the judging panel, and thought she came off as a screechy Marie Osmond... I'd actually fastforward it every time she spoke. But now that I've seen it from the beginning, I have a new respect for her, and I think she's great. And the dancing is fantastic. I showed part of last week's episode to my 4-year-old daughter, and now she wants to take up dancing. I'm going to see if I can get her signed up. I've never had a dancing lesson in my life (seriously, Elaine in Seinfeld looks like Baryshnikov compared to me), so I usually stayed away from shows like this out of a complete lack of interest, but I'm hooked. My husband is very ashamed of me. But he thinks Road Trip is a funny movie.

Now that Battlestar is coming to an end (in 2009... FRAK!) Tricia Helfer has already landed herself a pilot on Fox. Considering the show is by Shaun Cassidy, who did Invasion, I'm intrigued already.

Well, this was going to be longer, but I have to go out and buy my daughter a bathing suit.

Lost: Will It End Like The Sopranos?
Fastforward to May 2010. For six years Lost fans have been following the misadventures of the survivors of Oceanic Flight 815, and it's all come down to one final hour of the show. It looks like they're going to be rescued, but the remaining Others are closing in fast, and maybe they won't get on the helicopter after all. The music begins drumming louder and louder, and suddenly the helicopter pilot puts loudspeakers in the windows of the heli, a la Apocalypse Now, only, instead of the Ride of the Valkyries, the speakers are blasting Journey's "Don't Stop Believing." Just as Sawyer, panting and out of breath from running, spits out, "SON of a BITCH, I HATE this song!" the screen suddenly goes black. Fans everywhere think their satellite has gone out, there are five seconds of blank screen, and the credits begin silently rolling. That sound you then hear is 16 million viewers screaming, "NOOOOOOOOOO!"


Don't worry. It ain't gonna happen. According to an article in the NYT yesterday, while Damon and Carlton loved the ending of The Sopranos, with its ambiguity and stadium rock (seriously, I can NOT get that song out of my head), they won't be doing the same thing. Damon told the NYT, “I’ve seen every episode of the series. I thought the ending was letter-perfect.” He explains that he went upstairs to bed following the show, but just laid there for 2 hours thinking how great it was, and how it was the perfect ending. Carlton wasn't so quick to like it, though, admitting that he was initially frustrated, but after pondering it, realized “In that blank screen, there was a certain kind of purity in the choice Chase made to make it the fulcrum of the ending.” (His reaction was more like mine, taking about a day to sink in and actually like it.)


Tim Kring, creator of Heroes, wasn't as enthusiastic. He hadn't been watching the show lately, and came back to it this season to see how it would end. He found “the storytelling in the finale a bit disjointed, so that you lost the cause and effect of some scenes.” While my immediate reaction after reading this was, "Well, it was a HELL of a lot better than YOUR finale, and you just had to wrap up one season," it also gives me a lot of hope that he's aiming for something much bigger for the ending of his show.


If the enthusiasm of Darlton makes you worried about a similar blackout on Lost, however, don't fear. A Reuters story appeared today where they qualified their statements, and assured that they wouldn't do that.


More excitingly, however, they announced that this fall they will be introducing "mobisodes" to help fill the gap between the May finale and the February startup. While these eps will be tied in to Verizon Wireless (blech), the eps will be about 90 seconds each and will eventually air on ABC.com (they hope).

Cuse said the mobisodes, about 90 seconds each, will give hardcore "Lost" viewers more information that they probably weren't going to get through the show itself. What it won't be, they said, was a mini version of "Lost."

"It needs to be interesting enough and well produced enough that people feel they're
getting enough bang for their buck, even if it's free, the bang for their time," Lindelof said.

Lindelof said the negotiations for the talent took a long time, but they wanted to make sure that all of them were involved in the mobisodes. "Nobody wanted to see two people sitting on a beach that we've never heard of talking and saying, 'Hey, did you hear what Jack and Kate did today?' You want to see Jack and Kate. It's taken us three years to get those deals in place," Lindelof said.

Now, whether or not Canadian fans will be able to access them is a different story. So to the American fans, please find a way to download them and put them on YouTube for us Canucks. ;)


Read the rest of the story for a funny mention of Nikki and Paulo. :)


In other Sopranos news, and for my reader (why isn't there more than one?) who hated the Sopranos finale, check out the Salon review, which referred to the ending as sparking riots of ziti hurling in New Jersey.


The Globe and Mail reviewer (who typically I don't give a lot of weight to, but whatever) liked it.


The National Post reviewer (ditto) did not. (But since their search engine is complete crap, I can't find it to link to it. Read the Salon review; it's better.)


And totally unrelated, here's a funny pic I found on a MySpace site. Anything to get another pic of Desmond on here. :)

In tomorrow's blog: I've seen Knocked Up, and I'm mad as hell. They TOTALLY ripped off my first pregnancy!!!!!

Bada-Boom, Bada-Bing . . . It's Over

The Sopranos is over, and it sort of ended with a whimper, not a bang. Not that that was necessarily a bad thing, though some fans might think Chase took a bit of a copout in his ending. For weeks, fans have speculated on whether Tony would bite it, if Paulie would be a turncoat, if Phil would triumph, would Janice kill herself, would AJ kill himself, would Meadow or Carmela be killed in the crossfire and lead Tony on a fiery rampage, etc. But in the end, Chase refused to answer any of these questions. He's decided to leave the ending open, and let us figure out what WE think the future of these characters will be. The most similar ending I can think of is that of Angel, where the series ended with everyone running into battle. However, the writers managed to tie up all of the loose ends before that battle scene, and rather than it coming off as a copout, fans will forever remember them running into battle, swords raised and ready for the big fight, and that's all that matters.

So was the ending of The Sopranos really a weak ending, or did Chase insert enough clues in there to make it pretty obvious where things are going?

Tony is talking to the FBI, so there's a chance he might eventually go into the witness protection program. I don't see that as likely, since we saw way back in season 1 what he thinks of THOSE people, and he's someone who longs for a time when mobsters were mobsters, and not looking for the easy way out. He tries using the FBI — I give you info about "terrorists," you give me info about where Phil Leotardo is — but when they don't give him the goods, he turns his back on them. (Eventually, the agent DOES talk, which is a surprising turn of events, but we see he seems to have been rooting for Jersey all along.)

Sil is in the hospital, and looks like death. I don't think he's waking up.

Meadow will find her calling as a lawyer, and it was hilarious to see Carm's face light up with genuine pride, rather than the, "Sigh... why can't MY daughter be in med school like that loser drop-out friend of hers?" that we always get. AJ has taken a crap job in the film industry, financed by his dad, and it will end badly, and he'll go back to being the morose little useless prick he's always been.

Tony and Carmela go to see AJ's therapist, and Tony begins unleashing all his family secrets, the ones that Melfi took SO long to get out of him, in less than a minute. His mother never loved him, there was no love in that family period, he never felt love growing up, he's had a very difficult childhood. The look on Carmela's face is brilliant. We know that even if Melfi has said goodbye, Tony's getting a new psychiatrist any day now.

Janice is her mother. Plain and simple. The scene where she insists to Tony that she's nothing like her mother and has tried so hard to put that evil fiend behind her, then says, "But does anyone thank me for it? NOOOO!" was hilarious. She undermines the first part of her argument by being EXACTLY like Livia in the second.

Uncle June is gone. Tony realizes once and for all that where Junior is concerned, he's got nothing to fear. Will he keep him in the state institution, or will he pay for a better place for him?

NY and NJ have come to terms with things, and have gotten rid of Phil in yet another over-the-top grisly killing that Sopranos fans love to cringe at. I mean, his twin grandkids are sitting in the back of the SUV when it crushes his head like a melon. It doesn't get any sicker than that.

The episode ended with Tony sitting in a diner, waiting to have dinner with his family. He waits, finds a song by Journey, and pops it on. Carmela comes in, sits, they make small talk, and then AJ shows up, sullen as usual, but hopeful. When AJ enters the restaurant, there's another guy with him who sits at the counter, and keeps looking at Tony over his shoulder. Is he there to kill him or is he just realizing that's THE Tony Soprano sitting over there, the guy he no doubt had seen on the television earlier that week when Phil Leotardo's death made headlines? The guy gets up to go to the bathroom, Meadow arrives outside but parallel parks worse than I do (which is saying a LOT) and has to try 3 times to get that expensive car into the spot. She gets out of the car, runs to the door, the scene cuts to Tony and... dark. I, like I'm sure every other Soprano fan watching, thought, "Oh COME ON, the cable company chooses this very moment to cut the power??" There's about five solid seconds of blackness and silence, and then the credits begin to roll.

Tony will forever be looking over his shoulder, Carmela will always be trying to maintain some sense of normalcy with her family. AJ will forever be lecturing everyone on their lives while ruining his own, and Meadow will always be showing up late to fulfill the family obligations and maintain that same sense her mother wants. The loyalties in the family will ebb and flow, and Tony will be nostalgic for a time when it wasn't like this. He's said goodbye to the old guard with his farewell to Uncle June, and he's looking around him to see what still remains. There's very little young blood in his group, so this could be the last generation of the Mob, before the new generation — no doubt containing AJ — steps forward.

The key to the ending of the episode was the song that Tony puts on the jukebox. "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey seemed to be a strange choice, since the soundtrack of this show is usually old blues or jazz numbers, or Frank and Dino, or anything from a Scorsese sountrack. But if you look at the lyrics, it tells us everything Chase was trying to get across.

Working hard to get my fill,
Everybody wants a thrill
Payin anything to roll the dice,
Just one more time
Some will win, some will lose
Some were born to sing the blues
Oh, the movie never ends
It goes on and on and on and on

Tony and his posse and his family will go on and on and on, in some form or another, for a very long time. The NY section of Little Italy might be nothing more than a tiny strip, but these Italians will find their way into new areas, will adjust to the way society has changed, and will move on. I wasn't sure what I thought of the end of this series when it happened, but after thinking about it, it was probably the best way Chase could have ended it. If he can stay away from the movies (which will then make this ending look contrived), I'll be happy.

My all-time fave series finale is Six Feet Under (tears well up just thinking about it) followed by Angel. I'm hoping to add Lost to that list some day. What are your favourite series finales?

The Sopranos: How Will It End?
Wow... the good just keeps getting better. Last night's penultimate episode of The Sopranos was full of blood, lies, and nostalgia. In other words, all the things we love the most about this show.

The last two seasons have been building to a major showdown between New York and New Jersey, but the series has been about many other things. Carmela's willingness to pretend everything's okay, just so she can continue to get the diamond bracelets, live in the big house, and have a nice life. Tony's longing for the way the Mob used to be, and wondering why he's stuck in the era of it all changing. The Soprano kids being pretty useless. Tony's soldiers having wavering loyalties, rather than an undying fidelity to their captain. Tony's sister requiring a good smack upside the head. Dr. Melfi's struggle with helping a criminal, and wondering if she's helping him at all.

In last night's episode, Melfi finally brings Tony's sessions to an end. It's an unfair moment for Tony. Yes, he's a criminal. But he's also suffering from a mental condition, and despite Melfi's arrogant shrink Elliott filling her head with the latest crack psychobabble from the journals, Tony is in need of therapy. Elliott is such a hypocrite, and always comes off as such. On the one hand, he makes Melfi feel guilty for being a doctor to a Mob boss. On the other hand, his eyes light up whenever she begins to talk about "Leadbelly," as Elliott referred to him, in her sessions with him. Her cutting the ties with Tony had less to do with what that journal said than her own psychiatrist filling her head with more craziness than was there to begin with. I'm assuming that's the last we see of Jen.

It's also the last we'll probably see of Charmaine and Artie, as Tony and Carmela dine in their establishment while Carmela keeps up the lies of her family. Tony's also been right alongside her with the lying, but even he raises an eyebrow when she begins going on about how AJ is doing great, Meadow is taking constitutional law, everything's going well for them, blah blah blah. Carmela's blindness to the truth could only be leading to something horrific happening to her -- or worse, her family -- in the finale.

Meanwhile, Tony orders his guys to make the first move on New Jersey, and take down Phil Leotardo once and for all. But that's not how it pans out. He brings in "cousins from Italy" (I was hoping to see Furio and was disappointed when we didn't. But then again, Tony's been looking for him... and not in a good way. So it was unlikely we were going to see him. The goobers that Tony DOES bring in, however, can't seem to tell one white-haired guy from another, and they kill the wrong guy, then send out a call saying the deed was done, but mention their curiosity about the fact Phil spoke Ukrainian. Duh. Only when the paper comes out the next day with a guy who looks remarkably like Phil, but isn't, splashed on the front cover, do Tony's guys know they've f-ed up in a seriously HUGE way.

Tony tells his guys to lay low, sending out a call to everyone. But Bobby doesn't get the call. As he's standing in a model train store, talking to the owner about how it would be great if something as classic as the Blue Comet still existed, which would have brought a better crop of people to NJ and NY, two NY guys come in and shoot him. And shoot him again... and again and again and again... In fact, one of the onrunning themes of this episode is how not only is the Mob losing its respect for the institution and hierarchies within it, but they're just lousy at what they do. In season 1, we saw Tony take a guy outside and kill him with piano wire. At the beginning of this ep, Sil walks into a guy's house, puts the wire around his throat and takes FOREVER to actually get the job done, smashing cabinets and slicing his own hand in the process. In the train shop, they shoot enough bullets to take out an army, not just Bobby.

They then head over to the Bada Bing to take care of Silvio, and they shoot him through the windows in the car, even though Patsy somehow gets away. Again they don't finish the job properly (the NY guys are no better then the Jersey ones), and leave Sil comatose with little chance of recovery, with Patsy running through a back alley. Every single person in the Bada Bing comes out and watches them drive around the parking lot, and they make a mad dash to get back out on the highway, driving right over a motorcyclist in their haste. (Of all Tony's soldiers, Sil's always been my favourite, and I was so sad to see him go.)

The episode ends with Carmela and her kids holed up with Janice and Bobby's kids in Christopher's house (if only his wife knew how he'd died) and Tony, Paulie, and a couple of extra guys hiding out in what appeared to be Uncle Junior's house. Tony walks up to Uncle June's room, closes the door, and sits on the bed, in the very house where he was last shot and almost died. He pulls out the AK-47 that Bobby had given him for his birthday, and sits. And waits.

And now... so do we. Will Tony die? Will AJ die? Phil said no one was off-limits, and that includes the Sopranos. Phil knows where Christopher lived, because he had flowers sent to her house when he died (and then commented on how she didn't immediately call to thank him). Will something happen to Carm? Will Carm kill Janice (now THAT I'd like to see)? Will Paulie survive? He's such a turncoat he'd go over to NY in an instant, but I don't think they'd allow that.

Is this the end of the Mob as we know it?

HBO's Sunday Night

It was like any other scene of a mafia soldier driving around the big boss man, Tony Soprano, as they comment on music, the power struggles with the New York crew, and what they should do about their current problems. And then... it wasn't.

For one, we the viewers KNEW that Christopher was high, that he'd fallen off the wagon in the previous episode, had shot a screenwriter in the head and left him lying there because he was too high and drunk to think. Tony didn't know these things. We knew that Tony was royally pissed at Christopher about his slasher-movie Cleaver, because it depicted Tony as a lout of a boss raging in his basement in his white robe, and showed the darkest, seediest sides of Tony, despite Christopher's objections. We know that every time Tony looks at that Cleaver mug, his disappointment in his nephew balloons to gargantuan proportions, and he actually thinks he'd be better off if Christopher would just go the way of Adrianna. But he also knows he can't ask any of his other soldiers to do it.

So Christopher, high, possibly drunk, maniacally flipping through stations and only half-listening to Tony rambling beside him, veers off the road, and the car flips over and over and over (it seemed like it would never end) only to land in a mangled heap. Tony at first is worried about Christopher, who's lying there gurgling and moaning, and looks like he's by far incurred the worse injury. But when Christopher mumbles that he needs Tony's help -- "I won't pass the drug test" -- Tony's concern turns into cold-blooded rage. He stares at him, gets him to repeat it, establishes without a doubt that Christopher -- despite Tony's threats and talks, despite the intervention, despite all the people Christopher has hurt in the past -- is using again. He then glances into the back seat and sees the baby car seat with the tree branch through it, and he knows that if Christopher doesn't manage to kill himself, he will kill his daughter, his wife, and/or possibly Tony the next time. He knows there will ALWAYS be a next time.

He gets out of the car and hobbles around to the other side. Is he going to switch places with Christopher? Will he help him this one last time? He dials 9-1 on his phone... and then he stops, closes the phone, and complete dread washed over the audience. Christopher begins spitting up copious amounts of blood, and is choking on it. Knowing he can't breathe through his mouth, Tony says nothing, leans in through the car window, and with his left hand, pinches shut Christopher's nostrils. There's absolutely nothing in his eyes. James Gandolfini (who earns every single penny they pay him on this show) has this remarkable talent for slightly lowering his head and making those eyes under the hooded eyelids just stare into a person until their blood runs cold. MY blood runs cold just watching him. Christopher doesn't have the strength to fight him. He glances over, and there's not even a look of surprise on his face. It's as if he knew all along this moment was coming. He lasts a LOT longer than we, and probably Tony, thought he would, but eventually his head lolls to the side, and Christopher Moltisanti -- Tony's nephew, surrogate son, and most eager soldier at one time -- is dead. It was a remarkable moment in the series, and while many people thought Paulie would be the one to take out Christopher (or vice versa), having Tony do it was the only way it could have gone. The guy drove me nuts over and over again, but this was just a shock beyond anything the show's delivered, in my opinion. It was a brilliant scene.

From there Tony puts on the face of the grieving uncle, while dealing privately with the guilt of feeling immensely relieved. What's interesting is he never seems to feel guilty because of actually murdering Christopher, but for pretending to be broken up about it. He attends the wake, where Carmela is beside herself with grief, and doesn't even go up to the body. He's been closer to Christopher's dead body than anyone will be, and he doesn't need a second look. (In a rather amusing twist, Christopher DOES seem to get the last laugh when Paulie's aunt who he thought was his mother -- or mother who he thought was his aunt... which one actually died?? -- dies, and everyone goes to Christopher's wake instead.) He then heads of to Vegas to hang with Christopher's Vegas stripper, play poker, and do peyote. A couple of episodes ago we saw Tony's luck falling apart, and every time he'd lose a game of roulette, he'd glare at Christopher like he was the reason. Now he can do no wrong at the roulette table, and he attributes the death of Christopher to his new-found luck.

Meanwhile, Tony Jr. is part of the Little Mafia, and they're vile little creatures. AJ's life is like a caricature of his dad's, as he goes to a doctor who's sub-par compared to Melfi; is on drugs that don't work as well as Tony's; tortures and beats helpless nerds at school who owe his friends some money; and falls apart, wondering why "we can't just all get along??" Will he end up succeeding his father, or will Tony Sr. have destroyed what's left of the Mafia before AJ can get there and instantly obliterate it himself?

Over on Entourage, the mood was decidedly happier (the mood on the nightly news is decidedly happier than the Sopranos, for god's sake) as Drama's new show starts up, Turtle makes eyes at a girl who loves sneakers, and E and Vince FINALLY hook up with Ari again (oh happy day!!). Drama is afraid of the reviews coming out, and while I figured early on his reviews would be terrible but the ratings would be high, the revelation of that was still pretty hilarious. Basically, Drama's on According to Jim -- no critic worth his/her job actually likes the show, but too many people watch the damn thing for it to be cancelled. The clip they showed was just AWFUL (every word that Variety critic had to say about Drama was deserved) but hey, it's no secret that television is, for the most part, aimed at the lowest common denominator. The scene of Johnny being "distracted" at the rub and tug was easily the most uncomfortable scene I've seen all year -- I couldn't even watch. I've also been sad that Lloyd isn't getting enough lines this season, so having him break the good news to Drama at the end was awesome.

And now it looks like Vinny and E will be producers. I saw the big ratings twist coming, and when Turtle watched Sneaker Girl in his side mirror, I just knew his car would get smucked, but I didn't see the producer storyline coming, and I think it's a great direction to take the show. What will happen when the star of Medellín is also the owner of the script and producer? It could be great, but it could be a disaster. Personally, I'm hoping for the second, because watching Ari being just one bad phone call away from a heart attack for the next two seasons will be a beautiful thing.

Random Tuesday Ramblings
I'm stuck at home today unexpectedly, and trying to pass the time without moving for one day (doctor's orders) so what better way to kill time than to re-watch last Thursday's episode of The Office? It was AWESOME. Highlights for me:

Jim's impersonation of Dwight.
Jim: Question: What kind of bear is best?
Dwight: That's a ridiculous question.
Jim: False. Black bear.
Dwight: That's debatable. There are actually two schools of thought...
Jim: Fact. Bears eat beets.
Dwight: ??
Jim: Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica.
Dwight: That's... what is going on? What are you doing??

Jim punching in the amount the outfit cost him on his watch calculator.
Dwight freaking out about identity theft. "Millions of families suffer every year!!"
Okay, the entire opening was one of the BEST openings ever.

The frak-up that there's an obscene watermark on the paper.
Michael: "500 boxes have gone out, with the image of a beloved cartoon duck performing unspeakable acts upon a certain cartoon mouse that a lot of people like. I've never been a fan."

Michael using short forms.

Creed is quality insurance! Is that the first time we've ever actually heard what he did?? "The one year I blew it off, this happens."

Kelly's glee that she gets to train accounting in customer service: "This day is bananas, B! A-n-a-n-a-s! This day is bananas!"

Michael having a momentary nutty breakdown: "I need two men on this, that's what she said, no time! But she did, NO TIME!"

Michael holding a press conference to ALERT the press that this has happened.

CREED. "The only difference between me and a homeless man is this job. I will do anything I can to survive. Like I did... when I was a homeless man." First he goes and lies about who was at fault, then he gets the woman fired, then he takes up a collection for her because she has a kid, and then he STEALS the money. Could this guy BE any creepier?? I love him.

Kelly teaching accounting how to take calls, and the look on Oscar's face.

Andy and Jim in the car, with Andy telling him to "beer him" things. Jim asking for music and Andy begins to sing, hahahahaha!!

Jim getting out of the car: "Lord, beer me strength."

Dwight readying the office for the press corps invasion, telling Pam to run a comb through her hair and putting a large plant in front of Phyllis. "First rule of roadside beet sales, put the most attractive beets on top, the ones that make you pull the car over and say, 'Wow. I need this beet right now.' Those are the money beets." Why are beets so damn funny? I don't know, but it makes me laugh every time he starts talking about them.

Obit guy showing up from the Scranton Times, and Dwight giving him security clearance level three, "Don't get too excited, that's out of 20."

Andy's GROSSLY underage girlfriend.

Angela's apology: "The official position of Dunder-Mifflin is apologetic, so I don't know what you want from me."

Kelly: "First, I just want to say is that you are doing SO good. You have so many good qualities, but the one you might want to work on is apologizing?"

Michael's apology gone awry.
Client: I'm calling the Better Business Bureau!
Michael: Yeah, well I'm calling the Ungrateful Beeyotch Hotline!

Andy to the principal: I want to take out an ad in your yearbook. Whole page, 2 words.
Jim: Good luck.
Andy: That's not what I had in mind.

Dwight saying the sex between the animals appeared to be consensual because both animals were smiling.
"I grew up on a farm. I've seen animals having sex in every position imaginable. Goat on chicken. Chicken on goat. Couple of chickens doing a goat. Couple of pigs watching. Whoever drew this got it exactly right."

Michael's apology video, with the American flag in the background that is 4 pieces of paper taped together.

Kevin and Oscar doing their air high-fives.

Jim singing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" and Andy joining in.

Dwight doing his impression of Jim, and constantly looking into the camera and making crazy faces. "Nanana little comment. Nnn."

Ugly Betty
Still entertaining, even if completely predictable. (I mean, the moment Mommy Dearest -- who Buffy fans will remember as Riley's wife in "As You Were" -- showed up and said her daughter was 16, was there ANYONE out there who didn't think, "Sure she is.") I'd like to see Betty and Henry hook up before the end of the season. Will Santos work out? Will Dad go back to "May-hi-co"? How much longer can I pretend to care about the corporate takeover at Mode?

30 Rock
Had its moments -- Sean Hayes was inspired as Kenneth the page's hillbilly cousin ("we don't go out on account of the wolves") -- but overall, it was pretty disappointing compared to The Office. They had WAY too many lines to wrap up, and decided to tie them all up at once. There could have been so much more done with the Phoebe/Jack thing, especially since they've established some pretty underhanded things about her. Did Liz and the Floydster break up? Tracy Jordan has come back, and I wonder if they'll just drop the Black Crusader storyline to start fresh next year?

The Sopranos
Tony has money problems and a gambling addiction. MAN I wish Carmela's aim would improve, because watching that heavy sculpture actually hit Tony in the head would have been a long time coming. AJ's girlfriend saw him for the loser he is. Vito's son is a little goth felon. Janice wasn't on (thank god). Who will die this season? Phil? Tony? Christopher? Carm?

Entourage
Drama's ongoing feud with stupid Pauly Shore comes to a head when Pauly wants him on his reality show, Gotcha. But when he thinks he's been "got," turns out the other 3 guys were totally in on a WAY bigger scheme. The scene of Drama in the ring with UFC fighter Chuck Liddell was pretty hilarious (Chuck Liddell was famously Punk'd). At least now we know how Ari and Vince will get back together: He thinks he's having a one-off with his agent, the agent likes Vince, they'll be forced to break it off. Ari's frat boy loser friend shows up, and Ari's counting on him still being a loser, but he's not. He's a multimillionaire with a hot fiancee, and it kills Ari, until his wife reassures him she still thinks he's better than the loser. While the fight in the therapist's office last week was one of the funniest Ari freakouts ever -- it included him asking the therapist if she has a pill to make his wife a mute -- seeing them actually nice to each other was pretty cool.

Amazing Race
The Divas are out. Wah. My all-time favourite team, even if they did screw over Danielle and Eric last week (whom I hate, so we shall just forget about that). Now we have 3 teams going into the final leg that I don't really care about. As long as it's not Danielle and Eric, I think I'll be fine with it. Charla and Mirna drive me INSANE -- this week had a golden moment where Mirna actually said she just chooses the best accent for each country (as long as it's Italian, apparently!) and speaks to them so they can understand her. She ADMITTED it. What an idiot. The barbies are probably the best team, and if I had to root for one, I suppose it would be them. They listen to instructions, they get things right the first time, they don't hit the screen of their GPS thing 5 billion times after the nice army man has asked them to PLEASE STOP DOING THAT (ahem... CHARLA).

Sayonara Oswald and Danny. May your gay nursing home dreams come true, and all the best to both of you. You will be missed.

Woke Up This Morning...
Tomorrow night marks the final return of The Sopranos to TV (on HBO in the U.S.; TMN in Canada, 9pm) for the second half of season 6. These are the final nine episodes. Check out the latest issue of Vanity Fair for an awesome article about David Chase and the 10-year journey of the show (yes, six seasons in 10 years... the show didn't exactly move quickly). The writer calls it the best-written television drama... ever. True? Maybe... though my vote is still with The Wire.

The Sopranos still ranks right up there for me in my all-time top 10, so I'm super-excited. If, like me, you're one of those people who remembers general things, or events that happened four seasons ago, and you're saying things like, "Wait... Christofuh got married last season?? I totally forgot that" then you MUST check out this incredible, and VERY hilarious Sopranos recap. It's the complete 6 seasons retold in 7 minutes, and it's awesome (my fave moment: when Europe's 'The Final Countdown' plays for a second... you'll know why when you see it). You can watch it here:




Also, the Canadian broadcaster TMN has a behind-the-scenes promo here that has been running on the station.

Also returning tomorrow is Entourage: I mistakenly referred to it as season 4, but apparently, following in the footsteps of the Sopranos, it's the second half of season 3. Whatever... it'll still be awesome. Enjoy!

Return Dates that Matter
Sorry I haven’t been updating the blog lately. I finally got over my flu after five days, and then my husband got it, then my daughter’s nanny so I had to take my daughter all day while my husband lay in bed and moaned… it’s been a busy week. Add to that I’ve fallen behind in working on the Lost book so my evenings are now dedicated to working on the book rather than updating my blog (what a concept!) But I’m going to try to be better at this.

For now, I wanted to list some important return dates on our shows. This past Sunday saw the finales of BSG and Rome (I’ll talk about both soon, I hope), so those are off the schedule, and Lost is chugging along every week just like ABC promised. Here are some return dates to mark on your calendars

April 5 – The Office (will Michael hold a spontaneous meeting? Will Dwight’s desk be moved? Will Roy kill Jim?)
April 5 – 30 Rock
April 8 – The Sopranos, the final 9 episodes
April 8 – Entourage, season 4
April 23 – Heroes
May 1 – Veronica Mars

In other news, this past weekend’s Amazing Race had some awesome Charla and Mirna moments, as usual. They drive me INSANE but the masochist in me wants them to stay.
Mirna to ticket agent: What time does the ticket office open?
Ticket agent: 5:30 a.m.
Charla: But itta be 11 pm a-now. You calla da office now.
Ticket agent (in perfect English): I can’t call, it’s not open.
Mirna (realizing the agent must not understand English): Why-a you no do this for us? Why-a canna you help us?
Charla: Here. Pick uppa da phone. Just-a dial da numbers, clicka clicka clicka.
Ticket agent (speaking slowly because the Italians obviously don’t understand): THE. OFFICE. IS. CLOSED.
Charla: Why-a you no help us?
Mirna: Come on, Charla, obviously she just doesn’t understand.

But the best part, the part that made the entire episode worth watching, was when they finished first.

Phil: As the winners of this leg of the race…
Charla and Mirna: Yay!! Yay!! God, we love you Phil! Will you finally notice how hot we are????
Phil: …you have EACH won…
Charla and Mirna: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Phil: …your very own catamaran!
[The sound of crickets. A tumbleweed floats by.]
Charla and Mirna (I am not making this up) in unison: What’s a catamaran?
Phil stops to consider the possible responses: It’s a small chair that you can sit on in front of the fireplace.
It’s a large dog with a lot of hair. You’ve seen Afghans? Well, Catamarans are just hairier, and they shed a lot.

It's like an RV, only smaller.
[but sadly, he doesn’t]
Phil: It’s… a… sailing boat.
Charla and Mirna: Ooooooh! Well, woo! And hoo! I guess.