Stuff for a Friday
Um... blogger suddenly has a feature where I can add video? Where did that come from? (See, I open a new page to start a post, see something that catches my eye, and forget what I was just doing...) Mmm... new toys.

But I shall come back to that later. First of all, my husband and I have FINALLY begun watching Big Love and I think it's amazing. The core cast is great, and every episode you can't help but put yourself into the shoes of the characters. How could a woman sleep at night knowing her husband is in another woman's bed? How do you share someone who is supposed to be loyal to you? How do you have an argument about something when you know he could just turn to the more complacent wives and favour them instead? While at the same time, look at how these women share childcare, problems, help out with groceries, laundry, etc. It's such a brilliant series, and forces me to think of polygamy, something I've barely ever thought about. I was hooked by the first episode.

Kristen Bell loves nerds. I think she and I could hang out and become best friends forever. Well, probably not. I mean, if her audience are all TV geeks, then obviously she can't say that she doesn't get these people. Read the article to see her thoughts on being asked to be on Lost and what she thinks of being on Heroes (there's a minor spoiler about the connection her character will have with others, but it didn't rattle me, and I HATE spoilers). No comment on the end of Veronica, which is pretty disappointing.

Reason #4,852 to hate Andy Rooney. Why is this crotchety old man still allowed to speak? I grew up in a house where my dad watched 60 Minutes every Sunday, religiously (that ticking noise still unnerves me, because when my bedtime was 8pm I knew you'd hear the ticking at the end and had to go to bed), and loves Andy Rooney. But I'll never forget watching the show one week in 1994 and he went off on Kurt Cobain, post-death, devoting an entire segment to asking why the hell anyone cared about this talentless loser, when this kid that he'd found in a newspaper in Podunk, Nowhere, had also died that week and no one was holding candlelight vigils to mourn him. Sigh. Don't worry... we won't be holding candlelight vigils for you, Andy. Check out Best Week Ever for a pretty funny rundown of the article. (My favourite part is where he says he can't watch baseball because unlike the good ol' days, everyone now is named Rodriguez. Um... OK, and how much is the Stamford Times paying you to put your racism on your sleeve?)

Tis the release season of TV shows on DVD, and I'm super-excited. Dexter came out this past Tuesday, so if you haven't seen it, get it. It's a darkly funny and fascinating study of a serial killer by night, forensics guy by day, who discovers another serial killer that he must investigate, and he becomes increasingly jealous by this other guy's handiwork, until clues begin surfacing that convince Dexter the guy is actually speaking to him in some way. Next Tuesday (August 28th) is the release of Heroes on DVD. This is one I plan to buy and rewatch before it starts up again on September 24th. Apparently the pilot episode has been extended to 75 minutes from 42, and includes a new introduction to Sylar. Also on that day is the release of Friday Night Lights, which ranks up there with Big Love as "that show I should totally be watching but am not." Dark Shadows, episodes 1-35, will also be released on that day. This is one of those shows I always wish I'd seen more of -- a friend lent me a few episodes on VHS a couple of years ago (you know, I should really return those to him) and I watched it and was intrigued, so I'd like to see more. Anything involving vampires has me interested.


September 4 is the release date of season 3 of The Office (yay!) and if you've seen the season, as I have, it's still worth getting it just to watch the deleted scenes. That same day is the release of 30 Rock and Robot Chicken. Oh, and Prison Break (blech).


EW.com has an interesting interview with James Marsters (and a not-so-flattering accompanying photo) in which he says that he doesn't think Joss Whedon ever "got into" Spike, and that's why there would be no Spike spinoff. I think he's wrong (uh, was Marsters not watching the Buffy finale?) but it's an interesting interview nonetheless.

A third new actor has been cast on Lost. I'm assuming these people are all Others, but time will tell.

And finally, someone posted this item in my comments yesterday (thanks, Sarah!)

Wanted: More than 30 "Lost" babies
At least 30 babies were needed to play Claire's baby Aaron last season, making casting a never-ending process. So many are needed because, well, babies age quickly, outgrowing the part in just a week or so. To play Aaron, a baby must have blond hair, blue eyes, a slightly round face, weighing between 8 and 15 pounds.

So if my son is born in mid-September, could he qualify for the next round of Aarons? My daughter had a round face, blonde hair, and blue eyes, so there's a good chance he'll look the same! And if they need 30 of these babies, does that ensure that Claire and Aaron will be on for a while?

Angry, Angry, Angry People

I've been seeing a lot of things lately that made me want to blog on it, but individually, they didn't amount to much. So I thought hey, I'll compile some and just call them Angry People. I don't know what's wrong with people. Sure, I rant. I rant when one of my favourite shows lets me down. I rant when I'm overcharged for something. I rant when I get a tax bill saying my home has been reevaluated and now I have to pay back-taxes for the past 3 years, even though I've only owned the house for two... (stupid Toronto government... I really do have to call them about that one). I rant about a LOT of things.

But there are so many people out there saying stupid things about people, just generalizing everything and everyone, and they come off looking like morons. So let's start with Moron #1.

Looks like his Y chromosome had a bit of stupid attached

Canada's National Post had a column a few days ago about how women are still being paid less than men. So this rocket scientist thought he'd weigh in and let us all know the REAL reason why women aren't paid as much as men. After years of research and argument, thank you thank you Mr. Clark Brown for providing the definitive answer:

Re: Why Men Earn More, editorial, July 23.
The bottom line is that if women want to earn as much as men, they have to behave like men in the employment marketplace. That usually means: work longer hours at intellectually challenging, personally unrewarding careers that offer a poor workplace environment, physical hazards, pay linked to performance, an imposition on nonworking lifestyle choices or some combination of the above. Furthermore,
women would have to take on more responsibilities, make family sacrifices and be more productive in the jobs they have. That's how men do it. Women can do it too, if they so choose. — Clark Brown, Maple Ridge, BC

Well, ladies, I hope we've all learned our lesson. Thank goodness Clark Brown of Maple Ridge, BC has shown us the light. I guess this means men will start having the babies for us. And we need to stop skiving off work at 3pm and sitting in the corner twiddling our thumbs.

Wha? I reed! I reed book alot!

Andrew K%$!n, that guy bloggers love to hate (and won't write his name so he can't google himself), has written an AWESOME study of how the blogosphere is killing mainstream media and is made up of a bunch of stupidheads who don't read books and who can barely think, let alone spell. No offense to newspaper reporters -- I'm married to one, most of my friends are newspaper reporters, and I think there are some amazing ones out there -- but there are a lot of bloggers whose opinions on movies, television, books, etc. I'll take over theirs any day. Anyone read the movie section in the Globe & Mail lately? Maybe if they'd hire a reviewer younger than 75, I might actually listen to their advice.

Boobs are Bad

Now, this might not be for everyone, but having been through the experience (and no doubt will go through it again in a couple of months) I feel for this person. This blogger is posting an email that a friend of hers received from a family member, telling her they can't wait to see her at their daughter's birthday party, BUT... could she not breastfeed in front of anyone, please?

Now, I understand that some people might not be used to the sight of a breastfeeding mother. I remember going to a dinner party once when I was on my first pregnancy, and the mom of 3 suddenly grabbed her infant and pulled her top up and started feeding her while she never missed a beat in the conversation. At the time, everyone tried to avert their eyes, but now that I think about it, what was she supposed to do, leave the table?

I had my share of breastfeeding problems the first time around. It's not an easy task, but it's SO important. Our mothers are from a generation that generally formula-fed, so you won't get much help there, and there's still a stigma in society that breasts are genitalia. I spent the first month or so of motherhood pulling the drapes, locking the doors, and sitting in darkened rooms. And then I thought, to hell with it. I even came into the office one day and did it during a staff meeting. Now, I don't throw up my shirt and sit there topless while carrying on a conversation. If I'm in a swivel chair, I swivel away, latch on the baby, throw a receiving blanket over her, and swivel back. It's not hard, and since nothing is showing, the other person has no reason to feel weird about it. I'd say something in advance and ask if they wanted me to leave, but rarely did anyone say yes.

My mother-in-law, on the other hand, was a whole other ball of wax. She told me it was disgusting, asked me to go upstairs and close the door, told me that she didn't want me doing it in front of other people, told her friends I was starving my child because there's no way a child could be getting enough nourishment that way, and actually started to do things to try to thwart my chances, believe it or not (the worst was one morning when I went to yoga, and she dropped by, found some milk in the fridge, gave it to my daughter, and by the time I got home, with my body telling me to feed that kid NOW or you're going to burst, I was met with a happy, non-hungry baby, and a beaming mother-in-law who bluntly said, "I already fed her, so you don't have to now." Of course, I ALSO had problems pumping, so that milk had taken me 3 days to make so my husband and I could go to our first movie out together that night, and we had to cancel). So I've been through this. I've already been informed by her that I'd better not try that breastfeeding "nonsense" again. This time I'm going to just walk around her house topless, whether I'm feeding him or not. ;)

Is Your Child an Assmonkey?

And I've been meaning to post this one for AGES now. It made me laugh out loud when I read it. I'm not a huge fan of right-wing Jonathan Kay (or worse, his mom's columns) but this was funny nonetheless. Jonathan Kay wrote a piece about going to a restaurant with his kids, and was met with such a fury of hate mail that he had to post a second story about it (this was a few months ago). He got a lot of letters from people objecting to the term "childless" and saying they are "child-free," i.e. free of that horrific thing known as children. His favourite was from the man who wrote this:

"Mr. Kay, I hope we never have the misfortune to have your family ruin a nice restaurant near us, because I could hardly resist the compulsion to empty ice water into the faces of both you and your broodsow of a partner. Attention, Mr. Look-My-Sperm-Works, your job as a parent does not end at ejaculation: Would you please show the rest of us the Get Out of Courtesy card that they gave you when your wife [birthed] your first replicant? Polite parents do not assault diners with their loud brood of assmonkeys."

I must admit, while I laughed out loud at this letter, I have sometimes been walking down the street, belly out-to-there, wondering, "Is anyone looking at me as nothing but a heifer right now?" because according to this guy, I'm a "broodsow."

Does anyone else detect the bitterness and anger here? His reference to Kay as "Mr. Look-My-Sperm-Works" makes me think that maybe his, um, doesn't.

I have absolutely nothing against anyone who decides to go child-free: three people to whom I am closest in this world have made the choice to not have children, and I think it's a wonderful and selfless choice. They've said, hey, I don't have the time for a child, and I've decided to make this decision now, rather than having them and dumping them on a nanny. I think that's a pretty amazing thing to decide. And don't get me wrong -- these are people who love children.

But these people don't deride me for making the choice to have them. The latest barrage lobbed against parents is that we are DESTROYING THE ENVIRONMENT by having our kids. If everyone would stop having children, these environmentalists argue, then the Earth wouldn't have any burden of population on it.

Yep. And in 80 years, it won't have any population at all.

I have a daughter and will soon have a son, and my daughter is well behaved. I take her to East Side Mario's, and would never go to an upscale Italian restaurant with her, so parents DO need to take responsibility for their children, and not ruin a quiet night out for someone else. But to take it to the length this particular writer has taken it? Is that really necessary?

Why can't we all just get along?

Wait a Minute . . . I'm Knocked Up, Too!!!
I blogged a couple of weeks ago on the hysterically funny news story that the brain trust that is Rebecca Eckler had launched a lawsuit against Judd Apatow and the movie Knocked Up because it ripped off her book. Her contentions were:

A) she'd made a joke in her book about worrying about the baby's head being hit during sex
B) she'd commented on not jumping on a trampoline while pregnant, something repeated in the film
C) Her book was called Knocked Up, same as the film, and she apparently coined the phrase
D) she got pregnant while drunk at a party, as did the character in the film (well, Heigl's character got drunk in a bar, and slept with a guy she didn't know, while Becks got drunk at HER ENGAGEMENT party... the mind boggles)
E) she took several pregnancy tests to make sure she was pregnant
F) she talked about a friend with kids she turned to for advice, while Heigl turns to her sister with kids
G) the cover of her book had a binky hooked on a martini glass, which was the cover of the original script (and several other ads and illustrations, but who's counting?)
H) she was the first woman in the history of women to actually get pregnant and carry the baby for 9 months, and she was mad as hell that the movie would talk about EXACTLY the same experience of pregnancy that her book was about. Or something.

But when I blogged, I admitted I hadn't yet seen the film. Well, I've seen the film. And I'm pregnant. And I've been pregnant before and have been through everything, and dude? I'm PISSED. I will be launching my lawsuit next week against both Apatow AND Eckler.*

My contentions:
A) I got pregnant by having sex. I know, I know, very personal information, and it's not the typical way women get pregnant (isn't it crossing their fingers and hoping REALLY HARD?) but that's how I did it, and that's how both Alison (Heigl's character) and Eckler did it.
B) I talked to women who had kids when they were pregnant. They were friends of mine, and I wasn't actually asking questions about pregnancy, I was just TALKING to them, but hey, despite what Eckler said, in the movie Alison happens to live with her sister and doesn't actually ask her advice about giving birth or having a kid, it's more advice about men and marriage. So I figure if I talked to friends with kids while I was pregnant about the latest book they'd read or asked them for a recipe, I have grounds for a case.
C) I was pregnant during the 2004 Summer Olympics (I laboured during the men's high dive... seriously) and I saw women jumping on a trampoline. And it might have occurred to me that in my condition, I couldn't do that. Now, in the movie, Seth Rogen's character is reading a line from What to Expect When You're Expecting about how pregnant women couldn't jump on trampolines, and since that book predates Eckler's by about 15 years, and since she STILL thinks she has grounds for a lawsuit, then... so do I.
D) My belly got very round and big during my pregnancy (and it's big again... my arms are straight out in front of me typing this while I'm sitting further away from the desk) and so did both Eckler and Alison!! But that's not normal, right??
E) My pregnancy lasted 40 weeks. That seems like a REALLY long time, and so far, this one is doing the same. Both Alison and Rebecca went full-term.
F) I knew I'd gone into labour when I felt a lot of pain. Eckler felt pain. So did Alison. But labour should be painless, right? It's why so many women have kids.
G) I had an epidural when I'd been in labour for 20 hours and couldn't take the pain anymore. Now, I know that Alison ends up going the drug-free route with no pain meds at all, but see, Rebecca Eckler made a big stink about how there was NO WAY she was going to push one of those things out of her vagina, because IMAGINE what it would DO to that part of her body, and she actually flew out to Calgary to have an elective C-section because she said she was a busy gal who didn't have time for god-knows-how-long labour, and didn't want to go through the pain. In other words, she was willing to raise the kid, but not divulge the time and energy to actually HAVE it. So if SHE can say this movie resembled her experience when Alison is on the opposite end of the spectrum than Rebecca, then *I* can say the same thing for being even closer to Alison on that spectrum.
H) Alison takes the baby home from the hospital. *I* took the baby home from the hospital. Rebecca had her sister take the baby home from the hospital so she could go eat sushi, something she hadn't eaten for 9 months. My experience is more like Alison's.
I) Alison is an anchor woman on the E! channel. I watch entertainment shows. SERIOUSLY. Can you believe this??
J) Alison interviews Matthew Fox. I wrote a book where Matthew Fox features very heavily. The similarities are startling. (Okay, and in this scene is the best line in the film. Rogen says, "Oh no way, you're going to interview Matthew Fox? You wanna know the interesting thing about Matthew Fox? NOTHING." hahahahahahahaha)

The end of the movie is baffling, as there are several picture of Alison holding a happy baby and being a glowing mother. Rebecca, on the other hand, started a blog called "Nine-Pound Dictator" and never talks about the kid in any terms other than "GOD... motherhood is so HARD..." So I guess Becky is only suing on the pregnancy part? Or the early pregnancy part?

Seriously, Eckler, just quit. No one who has read your book (utter, useless tripe) and seen the movie (actually very funny, with the highlight being a run-in Alison's sister has with a bouncer that had me unable to breathe I was laughing so hard) will see the similarities.

I highly recommend this site if you want a laugh. They called for people to send in any pics they could find of a martini glass and a binky to show that Eckler's book is NOT the only cover in the universe to come up with a connection. They've also found other pop culture references riffing on the same jokes Eckler had in her book. Apatow's attorneys don't need to do a lot of extra work; bloggers are doing it for them. :)

*Nikki Stafford will not necessarily be launching a lawsuit next week.

You Want Funny?: Knocked Up
I got you there for a second... you thought I was going to give you a movie review of the new Judd Apatow flick, talking about how it was the most hilarious thing I've ever seen. But I haven't actually seen it. Since Apatow worked on The Critic (I loved), Freaks and Geeks (I adored), and The 40-Year-Old Virgin, I'm sure when I DO I will be doubled over laughing.

But no, what is even funnier than I'm sure the movie is this: Rebecca Eckler, Canadian columnist extraordinaire, is claiming the movie has COMPLETELY ripped off her book, which is called — wait for it — Knocked Up. Because, as we all know, Eckler coined that phrase. Ahem.

Now, as longtime readers of my blog will know, I'm not a fan of Becky Ecky. I find her writing self-absorbed, irritating, arrogant, and often infuriating. And since she writes all about herself, then I guess I find her that way, too. But now she's taken a movie that is original, funny, unique, and hilarious (all things she's aspired to be for 10 years, still with no success) and claimed that it is that way because, well, they stole EVERYTHING from her book.

You can read Ecky's claim here, in a piece she wrote for Maclean's magazine, a Canadian rag that is the sort of place you'll find rantings from an egotistical being. I opened my Globe and Mail this morning to see her mug staring back at me from the entertainment section, and almost spit out my orange juice laughing. It was brilliant in a way I could have never made up.

Eckler's charges: First, the movie is called Knocked Up. And so (oh my god!) is her book. In other words, neither one is original.

Secondly, Eckler got pregnant while drunk at a party. And so (AH!) does Katherine Heigl's character in the movie. Eckler mentions that her "one night of passion" led to 9 months of pregnancy in the article. But let's take a serious look at this, shall we? First of all, Eckler was ENGAGED to the guy who knocked her up. It was NOT one night of passion. (Or... maybe it was and you wonder just how desperate Ms. Eckler really was.) Heigl's character has a drunken one-night-stand with a guy she doesn't know and doesn't want to know, and is stuck having to get to know him while being pregnant with his child.

Thirdly, Eckler took several pregnancy tests. And (oh, I am REELING) so does Katherine Heigl's character!! But then again, I know that I and every other woman out there only had to take one. That's why they tend to sell the packages in twos or THREES. Cripes. (This is a perfect example of Rebecca Eckler's self-centredness... she's the sort of person to burn her mouth on coffee and think she's the only person on earth to have done it. But only after she's run outside to tell everyone she's discovered a new substance called coffee.)

Fourth, Eckler's book contains a joke about a couple having sex and hitting the baby in the head while she was pregnant. In the movie (oh no they didn't!), a character says he's worried about having sex with his partner because he could poke the baby in the eye. Um... maybe the writers of What to Expect When You're Expecting should be sending a cease and desist order to Eckler, because I remember my husband and I laughing reading it during my first pregnancy, and seeing the question about, "Can I hit the baby in the head if we have sex?" It's SUCH a common question, ask any midwife or doctor. But of course, only a common question because the entire universe read Eckler's book, apparently.

Fifth, Eckler says she never jumped on a trampoline when she was pregnant. She was aghast (AGHAST!) when she saw in the movie there was a joke about a trampoline. Uh... I checked with my resident 'pal who's seen the movie' (thanks, Crissy!) and she told me that the joke involved Seth Rogen's character being too heavy to jump on the trampoline that the little kids were on. Um... right.

So I figured I'd offer my services to Rebecca, not having read her book OR seen the movie, but hey, I bet I can come up with as legitimate a claim as she has so far. Hey Becky, they use the word "pregnant" in the movie a lot... I bet that's ALL THROUGH your book! And, oh, in the movie, the pregnancy lasts NINE MONTHS! Gasp... isn't that how long yours was??? At the end, she gives birth to... not a cat, not a ferret, not a bird, but... A BABY! Holy maternity clothes, wasn't YOUR kid a baby?? The movie was filmed in Hollywood, the land of women with eating disorders, and... oh no... I bet they got that from you as well, didn't they?? Shame on those plagiarist anorexics!!!

I think I'll stop now. This is just TOO easy.

But if you want more funny, check out this article about the made-up raves for Eckler's book. It's AWESOME. Even funnier, the Quill & Quire review of Ecky's newest book, Wiped (look for a surfing movie to be sued by Eckler next). Man, I could go on for days...

UPDATE: I just found this, as I was curious when Eck mentioned it in her Maclean's article. She said that Apatow had stolen an idea from Mark Brazill on That 70s Show, and it's true because she read it in Harpers. Read the actual article to see what an angry, freaky little man Brazill really is.

BREAKING NEWS!!
FOX cancels a series before giving it a chance!
Fans reel in shock

Ahem... or not. Poor Tim Minear. He of Firefly, Wonderfalls, The Inside, and by extension, Angel cancellations, this guy's name has become synonymous with "short-lived." Looks like the hatchet guys over at FOX have been tricking us with their patience this season in letting shows try a little longer. Turns out they were just waiting for Minear to bring them a property, so they could gleefully cancel it after TWO WEEKS.

Imagine some other mid-season replacement shows in the hands of these guys.

Memo on Buffy the Vampire Slayer:
Yeah, the show has been on for 3 weeks, and the Slayer still hasn't banged that tall creepy guy who hangs about in the shadows. Tell Whedon he's got one more week, and if we don't see some skin from her or the red-haired nerdy girl, it's off.

The Office:
Just saw the second episode. This show is just all wrong. First, where the hell is the laugh track? How do we expect our audiences to know when to laugh if the canned laughter doesn't tell them? Secondly, why is that guy with the messy hair always looking into the camera and raising his eyebrows? Get a new actor: this guy doesn't understand how to pretend the cameras AREN'T there. And finally, what the hell does that creepy guy in the corner do? Thank god you guys only filmed 6 episodes for this season; we're pulling it next week.

Lost:
Just saw the pilot scheduled for this September. Too weird. Move it to next March, where it can replace Reunion or something we'll cancel to fit it in. And get a guy in a goofy white hat and add a laugh track. It's just not funny enough.

I’m Getting Tired of This…
In the latest “star goes completely crazy” incident, Michael Richards, a.k.a. Kramer (for that is all he’ll ever be remembered for) has been caught on tape shouting racist comments at an audience member who heckled him at the Laugh Factory last Friday. When someone interrupted his act, he began screaming, “He’s a n****r! He’s a n****r!” over and over, and the audience actually begins laughing nervously, before talking loudly and leaving the place when they realize it’s not part of the act. You can see it at TMZ.com, where they’ve had the video running for days now. Last night Kramer appeared on Letterman, all sober and apologetic, and saying he’s very sorry that he hurt anyone, and he didn’t mean it.
Right. And Mel Gibson doesn’t have an anti-Semitic bone in his body. Remember him getting drunk a few months ago, screaming about the Jews, and ending up with his mugshot plastered all over the newspapers, looking like a looneytune? Don’t worry, folks — he didn’t mean it, either.

Then there’s Isaiah Washington, a.k.a. Dr. Burke on Grey’s Anatomy, who called a fellow actor a “fag” on the set of the show (T.R. Knight, who plays Dr. O’Malley), not realizing the guy really was gay (or at least that’s his story). Knight came out publicly, and Washington released his feeble apology, saying the comments had been “beneath” him. Give me a BREAK.

Oh, and don’t forget the two yahoos that appear in Borat when the Kazakh journalist is picked up by them and they begin to rant about women and black people, saying that it’s a shame slavery has been abolished and they wish they still had the right to own slaves. Now those two brain trusts are suing the show saying they’d gotten them really drunk and they didn’t mean a word they’d said.

I’m SO tired of this crap. Listen, I’ve been out partying with friends, and while I’ll admit I’m not a drinker, it can be just as much fun watching your friends get drunk. And none of my friends use the n-word, denigrate women, or make racist comments. Why? Because they don’t believe it. Alcohol loosens the tongue, and can act like a truth serum. The only reason you would say these things while drunk is because you’ve lost the filter that stops the little things in your brain from making it to your mouth.

Mel Gibson is an anti-Semite. Isaiah Washington is a homophobe who should be fired from the show, not just for his comments, but for the fact he said it to a co-worker, while in the middle of an argument with another one. The two yahoos should be strapped to a chair, forced to watch Borat over and over… no, wait, that’s a good movie… they should watch Walker Texas Ranger over and over… wait, they’d probably enjoy that… um… they should have leeches attached to their eyeballs.

But Michael Richards didn’t have any alcohol in his system. He chalks his actions up to being out of control with “rage” … because someone heckled him. O…kay. He’s not sorry that he hurt anyone, he’s sorry that it was caught on tape, and that he’ll now be out of work. But then again, considering the less-than-stellar career he’s had post-Seinfeld, it’s not like Tom Hanks was the one caught on tape this time. Will this incident be the one to wake up Hollywood, and make them realize they have to stop forgiving their own when they do stupid and hateful things like this?