Wednesday, October 24, 2007

My First PVR Casualties
Well, it was too good to last. I've finally deleted two "events" from my PVR. The first... Bionic Woman. I can't believe this is the same show I was SO excited about all summer long. But after 5 weeks (feels like 15) it is so dull dull dull and dead boring. Every episode is exactly the same and goes absolutely nowhere. You know what, David Eick? Forget hiring writers. I'll give you the skeleton script you've been working with, and you just need to fill in the "bad guy of the week."

Intro:
Jaime sits alone in a room while emo music plays, rain falling against the window, sad about her lot in life.

Cut to Sarah, threatening someone. Probably has the shakes, or not, depending on if she's had her fix.

Back to Jaime and her sister, and Jaime lies to her sister, sister looks suspicious.

Jaime at the agency, and the bald guy (I haven't bothered to learn names) mentions she's worth $50 million.

Jaime figures out some new part of herself, but in the heat of battle, takes something like 10 minutes to actually use it.

Cut to Jaime doing martial arts with Asian guy, while Asian guy thinks about Sarah.

Sarah meets up with Jaime, threatens her sister.

Jaime goes back agency, yells that she's her own person and they don't own her. They talk her into doing the mission anyway. INSERT MISSION OF THE WEEK.

Sister finds out Jaime's lying about something. Sarah is caught. Then gets away. Threatens someone. Vows to get Jaime.

Jaime goes home to her sister, they argue, emo music plays, she tells her sister how much she means to her.

END.

Blah.

The second show is Cane. It started out great, but now it just feels week after week like King Lear meets The Godfather. Brothers all stabbing each other in the back, no one is loyal to the family, dad's going to die, Mom is all pretty and dominant. I just cannot get past the incestuous relationship between Smits and his wife, and the terrible casting. They cast some woman in her mid-30s to be married to Smits, in his mid-50s. Every time she walks on screen I think it's his daughter, until he kisses her in the way you don't kiss a daughter. I find it boring, and just don't have time for it with other good things on TV.

And one of those good things is Pushing Daisies, which I'm THRILLED to report has been picked up for a whole season!!!!! YAY ABC!!! I'm so happy. (Thanks for the link, Sarah!)

5 comments:

Michele said...

I have to agree with you on Bionic Woman. Last week, I watched about half and said, "That's it! No More!"
The show is sooooo boring that I almost fell asleep last time.

Your "script" is exactly right...you should be charging NBC a writer's fee!

Corey Redekop said...

But how can Pushing Daisies last? While it's fun, I would be astounded if it can keep its whimsy up for over one season.

Brian Douglas said...

I like Bionic Woman. :-)

doyousmellcarrots said...

thank you for replying to my post.
I've been upset over Nestor's gig on cane since talks between abc and cbs fell through to allow him to do one episode of lost while cane is still on the air. I may have over reacted, and I agree now, he has just as much blame for the situation as cbs executives. especially because he signed on to cane after he filmed "The Man Behind The Curtain" and found out how important and intriguing the role of Richard is on the show

Sarah said...

I gave up on Bionic Woman last night. As soon as the assistant prof made go go eyes at here I said - that's it. This show sucks. And seriously the show is a good idea. The problem is the writing and the casting. If I see sisters on TV again that want to kill each other over stupid shit I will, I don't know what I will do - bake maybe. maybe I will bake.