Angel S5: Not Fade Away

As many of you know, my all-time favourite series finale is Six Feet Under, as I know it is with many of you. But that's mostly for the last five minutes, which I've watched so many times I've lost count. I couldn't honestly tell you what happens in the rest of the episode that preceded it. That last five minutes, though? SUBLIME.

But my second-favourite series finale of all time is Angel's. And I love it for the entire episode, so in some ways that pushes it right to the top. Every character arc was beautifully realized, every moment was wonderfully written and acted. I adore this episode, and what it says.

I went back to check my entry on it in my Angel guide, Once Bitten, and honestly, to sound REALLY immodest here, I was really quite delighted with what I'd written there, and couldn't possibly add anything to it. (It was that long entry for the Angel finale that inspired all my long entries in the Finding Lost books that followed.) For anyone who has held off reading the exclusive and spoilery Alexis Denisof interview in the book, feel free to finally read it, where he reveals that the decision to kill off his character was a direct result of the show being cancelled. He was absolutely lovely, and perhaps that's part of the reason why I love his character as much as I do. But I think it's mostly because of this episode.

Instead, I'll just say three things, and leave the rest of the talking to you.

Why I loved this episode:

Because "effulgent" made me laugh. ♥♥♥



Because "Would you like me to lie to you now?" made me cry. A lot.



And because "I kind of want to slay the dragon" made me cheer. It doesn't matter what happens at the end of that alley; in my mind, our heroes will always be racing into battle, willing to die to save the world.



Thank you to everyone who stuck around for Angel S5, and who have been with the Great Buffy Rewatch from the beginning. It's been a blast rewatching the Buffyverse with all of you.

Angel S5: Eps 13, 14, 15

5.13 Why We Fight
5.14 Smile Time
5.15 A Hole in the World

For my lengthy analyses of these episodes, follow along in Once Bitten.

While last week's episodes were stellar, THIS is the week I've been waiting for. Because after "Why We Fight," we're treated to the single funniest Angel episode of all time, followed by the single saddest. Only a Joss Whedon show could take you on such highs and such lows. First we get "Smile Time," an episode that didn't just elicit laughter from me, but full-bodied guffaws. I mean, the PUPPET is brooding, for goodness sakes. HILARIOUS. Oh, how I love that little puppet man. And Spike's response? Sends me into giggle fits every time I see it.

And then... the laughter is over. For Wesley has FINALLY been united with his true love, only to have her ripped from him in the most horrible way.



"There's a hole in the world. Feels like we ought to have known."

I remember interviewing Amy Acker and Alexis Denisof, separately, and both talked about how difficult those final scenes of Fred were to film. Apparently they begged Joss to do the episode, and he wasn't originally slated to, but he eventually got things switched around, and then pushed both Alexis and Amy to the ends of what they could handle, making them do the scene over and over again until it was so utterly painful to watch. And of course, that's when Joss is happily finished. Could anyone but Joss have written this scene?:

FRED
Will you kiss me?

Wesley kisses Fred on the lips tenderly and passionately.

FRED
(pulls back, looks down)
Would you have loved me?

WESLEY
I've loved you since I've known you. No, that's not—I think maybe even before.

FRED
(leans her forehead against his)
I'm so sorry.

WESLEY
No, no, no.

FRED
(chokes on her coughs, crying)
I need you to talk to my parents. They have to know I wasn't scared, that it was quick. That I wasn't scared.
(starts convulsing)
Oh, God.

WESLEY
(grabs her, looks into her eyes)
You have to fight. You don't have to talk, just concentrate on fighting. Just hold on.

FRED
(holding onto Wes's shoulders, looks into his eyes, quivering)
I'm not scared. I'm not scared. I'm not scared.
(her grip softens, she can't hold herself up)
Please, Wesley, why can't I stay?
(she goes still as Wes holds her in his arms)

WESLEY
(looks at her limp body in his arms)
Please...
(hugs her)
Please...

I will never forget the first time I saw this episode. When Wesley first takes Fred back to her place and she asks him to read to her, I quickly looked at my husband and said that if I came down to my final moments and could have any book read to me, it would be Frances Hodgson Burnett's A Little Princess.

And then... that's exactly what he's reading to her a few moments later. I've never had a moment of television feel like it was speaking directly -- and only -- to me, like that one did. I began crying right there, and didn't stop until long after the episode had ended.

Goodbye, Fred. And for anyone who thinks losing Fred is the deepest pain Wesley could ever feel, keep watching.

Angel S5: Eps 10, 11, 12

5.10 Soul Purpose
5.11 Damage
5.12 You're Welcome

For my lengthy analyses of these episodes, follow along in Once Bitten.

"Soul Purpose" and "Damage" are both good episodes, but thank the writers for "You're Welcome." For all of us who were immensely upset with the way Cordelia's character ended in S4, this gave her the send-off she deserved (and by the way, she looks FANTASTIC). We not only followed her through four seasons of Angel, but three seasons of Buffy before that, and her character arc deserved much better than to become some pseudo-incestuous mommy end of Connor's Oedipal issues. I remember crying for ages after the end of the episode, and it still chokes me up.

Next week: Two episodes that are a big part of why we babble incessantly about our love of S5.
5.13 Why We Fight
5.14 Smile Time ♥♥♥
5.15 A Hole in the World ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

Angel S5: Eps 7, 8, 9

5.7 Lineage
5.8 Destiny
5.9 Harm's Way

For my lengthy analyses of these episodes, follow along in Once Bitten.

This week marks a turn in the events, with "Lineage" and "Destiny," two great episodes. As I've mentioned, Wesley is my favourite character in the Whedonverse, and every time the writers throw Wesley for another loop, my heart sinks for him, but soars for me as a television viewer, watching the extraordinary Alexis Denisof sink Wesley deeper and deeper into himself. The torment he endures in "Lineage" shows us that Dark Wesley wasn't a new thing, and perhaps was inevitable if that was really his upbringing. The Wesley we were first introduced to in S3 of Buffy was covering a lot of pain. (Despite the sadness of the end of this episode, we get that fantastic line from Spike where he mentions the events from "Lies My Parents Told Me.")

In "Destiny" Angel realizes he's got some competition for greatness, and of all creatures to pose a threat to him... it's SPIKE. I love the race for the Cup of Perpetual Torment.

"Harm's Way" is ok, but it distracts from the overall building tension of the season.

Angel S5: Eps 4, 5, 6

5.4 Hell Bound
5.5 Life of the Party
5.6 The Cautionary Tale of Numero Cinco

For my lengthy analyses of these episodes, follow along in Once Bitten.

Last week you guys seemed to take the reins of watching Angel really well, so once again I'll provide the forum, and I really enjoyed what you guys said. Just a note that I think the rewatchers might enjoy these episodes more than first-timers, simply because we know what's coming, and these episodes seemed a little odd the first time through, but once you realize how the season ends, they make more sense. Keep at it... you won't be disappointed. :)

Next week:
5.7 Lineage
5.8 Destiny
5.9 Harm's Way

Spoiler Forum: Angel S5, Eps 4, 5, 6

Here's the spoiler forum, where you can talk about these episodes in the context of the remainder of S5 of Angel.

Angel S5: Eps 1, 2, 3

5.1 Conviction
5.2 Just Rewards
5.3 Unleashed

Well, I really intended to write a few words for this first of the Angel S5 episodes, even though I said I'd basically just be posting these to be forums. But it's been a crazy week with holidays and all, and I've read been spending most spare moments reading the Twilight series (I'm just finishing Breaking Dawn right now, and I really want someone to put a stake in me). It's research. No, really it is. I'm going to be giving a paper in Nebraska at the end of January on Twilight, and I'm reading all the books so I really know what I'm talking about. It hasn't been all bad. I mean, I have had the joy of seeing Bella in extreme pain on a few occasions, so that was fun.

But back to Angel. He and the Angel Investigations team is... working for Wolfram & Hart? Wait, they RUN Wolfram & Hart?

Don't worry, it'll make sense soon. ;) Until then, these are a fun group of episodes. I especially love the very opening of "Conviction" when we see a repeat of the Angel premiere, with Angel saving a girl from the alleyway. But... it's a little different this time. He's not quite so alone, as much as he wants to be.

I know there was something else I was going to mention... blonde, vampire with a soul or something... but it escapes me. So I'll let you guys discuss it. ;)

To Angel or Not to Angel

When Buffy started its fourth season in September 1999, it aired from 8 to 9 p.m. Immediately following that broadcast on the WB network was the first and only Buffy spinoff, Angel, which aired from 9 to 10 p.m. It was touted as the more adult version of Joss Whedon’s cult show, set in the dark and seamy underbelly of L.A., rather than the hellmouth and high school of Sunnydale, California. Where Buffy was a drama centering on a girl struggling with growing up, huge responsibilities, relationships, and the weight of the world on her shoulders, Angel was about a vampire with a history, with a film noir sensibility (complete with detective agency), usually set at night. Buffy’s theme song was loud rock music; Angel’s was a mournful string quartet (with rock band accompaniment).

In other words, Angel is a very different show from BtVS. So the question I’ve gotten from about the third week of Angel’s existence is... should I be watching that show, too? For me, it seemed like a no-brainer. Of course I’d be watching Angel. If I love Joss’s writing as much as I do, and if I’ve come to care about Angel, Cordelia, and other characters as much as I do, would I really not be the least bit curious? I was there from the first episode, and never stopped. But many other fans didn’t hold on the same way. Because it was so different, they simply weren’t interested. I never felt like watching Angel was a slog, nor was I watching it out of any sense of duty to Joss Whedon.

If you’re still with us in this rewatch, then I can tell you the same thing I tell the first-time Buffy fans (for, you are no longer newbies if you’re already about to enter season 4). You have to make it through the first season of Angel, and you will be rewarded. Season 1 is very monster-of-the-week, running alongside the difficult season 4 of Buffy (a season that is absolutely worth watching because it contains some of the most stunning episodes of the entire series, even if the overall arc is less-than-appealing). Season 2 of Angel, however, is much like season 2 of Buffy: it takes the mythologies and relationships established in season 1 and builds on them. It runs alongside season 5 of Buffy, and was the last time both shows appeared on the same network. When Buffy jumped ship to UPN the following year, season 3 of Angel was left on its own, and it... is... AMAZING. Season 3 of Angel just might be the single best season of any Joss Whedon property, in my opinion. I’m sure I’ll have many detractors, so let me say again, IN MY OPINION. It contains highs and lows that left me absolutely gutted. I thought my heart was ripped out of my chest in “Passion” and stomped on in “Becoming, Part 2,” but season 3 of Angel took what was left and dropped it into a vat of acid. Pain... heartbreak... romantic love... filial love... friendships ripped apart... it’s amazing. And one character stands above all the others in that season... one who is currently on Buffy at the end of season 3, so I won’t say who. But Angel fans will concur that his particular arc on that show rivals the character development of any other. His story is what made Angel spectacular. David Boreanaz is great, but Angel’s story takes a back seat to the anguish this character goes through.

So, as you may have surmised, my answer is yes, you should watch Angel. The question is, how? When both shows were still on and I was getting people hooked on both of them in time for Buffy’s final season, I would lend them my videotapes (yes, I said videotapes... recorded from the TV with the original dancing frog WB commercials in them), and urge them to go back and forth. Buffy episode 1 season 4, then Angel episode 1 season 1. Buffy episode 2 season 4; Angel episode 2 season 1. Back and forth... The first person who did it said it was perfect, although she said it would have been fine to have jumped ahead and maybe watched three episodes at a time. As long as you have a list of the crossover episodes of Buffy in the first season, you’d be fine doing that (stay tuned to the end of this post for that list). After that, I continued suggesting that to people even after we moved into DVDs. That’s when it became more difficult. You pop out a DVD, you have to wait for it to load, then go to the episode, remember which one you watched last, and move to the next. It’s not as easy as VCR tapes, where you pop them in and they’re in the same place you last left them. So people began watching Buffy’s entire fourth season, followed by Angel’s first. And even then, they told me they could have just watched Buffy on its own, finished the entire series, and THEN watched Angel. I disagreed, but everyone can watch them however they’d like.

Last year, the most recent work colleague to get turned on to Buffy ventured into the show, and she followed the advice of those who said you could watch all of Buffy followed by Angel. By the time she was into Angel’s second season (surprisingly quickly... she is a whiz at watching TV!) she was loving it, but said something felt flat, especially in the crossovers. She said she wished she’d watched them together. She’d already said goodbye to the Buffy characters at the end of season 7, and suddenly she’s gone back in time four years and is in Angel territory. Buffy ended in May 2003, and Angel continued for one more year without it, so it was weird for her to pinpoint where the other show ended, and try to remember the feeling, especially when characters who survived the finale of Buffy began appearing in the fifth season of Angel.

So, I think my original assessment is right. I would urge you to watch them together, at the same time, so you’re keeping with the sensibility of the show. And when I say at the same time, I mean you could watch the entire season of one show, followed by the simultaneous season of the other (with the exception of season 1, which needs to be watched closer together, as I'll explain below).

While I would LOVE to conduct a simultaneous rewatch of Angel each week, I simply don’t have that kind of time. Even the Buffy rewatch is starting to become a little bit much for me on top of everything else in my life. However, I will direct you to my Angel episode guide, Once Bitten, which is more indepth than my Buffy book simply because it came later in my writing career, when I found myself with far more to say (see Finding Lost for when things truly got out of control). In certain Angel episodes, I mention what episodes of Buffy happen simultaneously with it, if relevant, and I also mention any other Buffy connections (hints, allusions to the other series, etc.) that were dropped in each one.

But here’s what I’ll do. There are a few key Angel episodes in season 1 that involve Buffy and the gang, and I’ll mention those specifically during the rewatch. Each week when I say what’s coming next week, I’ll also mention which Angel episodes you should be watching to keep caught up. Again, you could watch a group of Buffys followed by a group of Angels, but here are the key ones to make sure you watch together:

Season 1
There’s a quick crossover in the pilot episode of Angel with S4E1 of Buffy, one of those blink-and-you’ll-miss-it moments. See if you can find it.

S1E3 of Angel, "In the Dark," is the conclusion to a story that begins in Buffy's third episode, "Harsh Light of Day." So be sure to watch the Angel ep right after the Buffy one.

Watch S4E8 of Buffy (“Pangs”) before S1E8 of Angel (“I Will Remember You”). And honestly, even if you don’t plan to watch Angel, try to catch this one episode. It’s the best non-Buffy Buffy episode ever.

The two-part episode 18-19 of Angel, “Five by Five” and “Sanctuary,” come after the Buffy S4 episode, “Who Are You?”, episode 16.

Seasons 2-5
After season 1, the Buffy connection grew weaker as Angel became its own show. In season 2, episode 7 of Angel (I won’t say the title name, because it’s a little spoilery), follows the S5 Buffy episode, “Fool for Love.”

The next crossover isn’t until S4 of Angel, “Orpheus,” but you don’t really have to watch that in tandem with S7 Buffy, since the crossover is barely mentioned over there.

And that’s pretty much it for crossovers. So essentially, watching season 1 of Angel in tandem with S4 of Buffy is a good idea. After that, you could watch one season of one show, followed by its sister season on the other, and you’ll keep pretty much up to date with both of them.

I do hope that you check out Angel, and stick with it to find out why the Whedonists love that series as much as they do Buffy.

RIP Andy Hallett

I was saddened to hear tonight that Andy Hallett, best known to genre fans as Lorne on Angel, passed away from heart failure at the age of 33 yesterday. I know he'd been having problems with an enlarged heart during the last season of Angel, which is why he featured less in that season. When I last spoke to him in 2004, he was not well at the time. My condolences go out to his family.

Slayage Conference: Day Three

Mmm... Wesley.

Sorry, where was I?

Day Three. I've already given you the opening of it, with Jeanine Basinger's fantastic talk. From her keynote we went to see Stacey Abbott, who was a featured speaker and author of several Buffy-related tomes, including Reading Angel (long discussion on how it was supposed to be Investigating Angel, but her publishers wanted to attach it to their "Reading..." series). Her paper:

"'I don't know what kind of man I am anymore': The Damaged Man in Angel and post-Angel Cult Television"

Her talk was about an hour long (and she was the master of power-point and audio-visual clips) and she focused on Wesley and Gunn as examples of damaged men in Angel. She had the honour of having Jeanine Basinger in her audience, which was the only session where I saw her (which must have been daunting, but Stacey certainly didn't act like it was), and it was a fantastic paper. And, for me, depressing. Matthew Pateman, in his keynote, mentioned that Wesley is his favourite character of either show, and he got a smattering of applause and cheers for saying that. One of the applauders was me. I heart Willow more than words could say, but Wesley was the richest character, and one of the most remarkable examples of character development I've ever encountered (and I'm counting books, TV, and movies in there). He begins as a sputtering Hugh Grant-type with the hots for Cordelia, and you roll your eyes and hope he lasts a couple of episodes before being eviscerated. I'll admit when he showed up in episode 10 of Angel after Doyle had died, I just stared at my television in horror thinking, "You're going to replace Doyle with HIM?!" Yet by the end of season 1, he was already intriguing. By the end of season 2, I loved him. And by season 3, he was the main reason I was glued to my set week after week. Never has a character been more put upon (Erica Kane? Puh-leeze... Wesley WISHES her life were as easy as hers!) and as such, become dark. Wesley changed SO much throughout the development of his character, and just when you thought maybe, just maybe, he might be happy, something else happened. (SPOILER ALERT for season 5): When he dies in the final episode, I was bawling my head off, and it took days for me to recover my senses, and yet, at the same time, his death was a welcome one, as if only in death might Wesley find just a small bit of peace.

So when Stacey began talking about Wesley as a damaged man, showing clips of some of his darker moments, I felt a lump rising in my throat. The clips were painful to watch (and I mean that as a compliment), and while other papers made me want to explore a few episodes, Stacey's made me want to watch the series in its entirety once again... or maybe just seasons 2-5 (skipping part of 4) and focusing on Wesley. She showed that incredible scene (filmed by Whedon, of course) of Gunn and Wesley squaring off in "Spin the Bottle," where Gunn looks at him squarely after Wesley shows very little emotion or remorse for anything, and says, "What happened to you, man?" And Wesley, in a moment so perfectly delivered by Alexis Denisof, says, emotionless, "I had my throat cut and all my friends abandoned me."

Talk about the line that can stop a conversation.

It's one of my favourite moments in the series, and I was thrilled she showed it. Even if it made me want to crawl into a fetal position and not move for a couple of days.

She also talked about Gunn, but even his damaged self usually feeds back to Wesley. When Gunn makes the pact that eventually kills Fred, it's Wesley who must face Illyria and force himself to become her Watcher, so to speak. When I was working on my Once Bitten book and interviewed Alexis Denisof, I was very lucky in that he was gracious enough -- and eloquent enough -- to give me as long as I wanted, and he eagerly went through Wesley's entire character development with me, helping me map it out and giving me his thoughts along the way. It's the reason why, out of all the actor interviews I did for the book, his is the only one that I just ran verbatim as its own chapter. I hope at the next Slayage conference there's a panel devoted to Wesley. Or how about a day? A weekend? I'll be there. :)

Just as a side note, Stacey also mentioned other damaged men in genre television, and noticed the prevalence of damaged men named Jack: Jack Bristow (Alias), Jack Shephard (Lost), Jack Bauer (24), Captain Jack Harkness (Torchwood)... as well as the Pie Maker (Pushing Daisies) and Logan Echols (Veronica Mars).

After Stacey it was lunch time. Sue and I wanted to take pics with Ian and Ryan, our two lovely friends, and we pulled someone out of the lineup for shuttles so she could take our pictures (staking each other with the Slayage Registration sign) and then when we turned, the shuttles were gone. D'oh. Luckily we found one more and we all went to Subway. After that we headed over to the B&B to sit on the veranda (during the day = less bugness) and chat about what we'd seen so far and what we'd missed. One of the scholars, David Kociemba, had been in a few sessions and he always had some of the most insightful comments (he was the one who suggested Willow's addiction is more like Overeaters Anonymous and not Narcotics -- at that same panel, when someone commented that Nikki Wood was a bad mother because she took her son Robin slaying with her at night, David retorted, "Hey, good daycare is hard to find!" hahahahahahaha!!). I'd missed his paper on "The Spoiler Virgin Project," but it sounds fascinating. I've asked him to email it to me and I can't wait to read it! Basically, he teaches an entire course on Buffy (how much do I wish I was in his class?!) and he said he's got three different kinds of students: those who haven't seen Buffy and think it's an easy course, those who have seen it all and are well-versed in it, and those who say they haven't watched it, but it turns out they have. So his big conundrum has been spoilers: How do you teach a class on seasons one and two without giving anything away, especially if you assign reading and the paper you assign them to read refers to events a few seasons away? So he started the spoiler virgin project, where he has gone through all the academic papers and worked out which ones are safe for what episode. As someone who DESPISES spoilers, I loved it. This is a man after my own spoiler-free heart. So that began a long discussion on spoilers and non-spoilers and why people want them, etc.

The next panel was a "Dynamic Duo" session, where two key speakers who have made names for themselves in the academic Buffyverse give papers. The first was Janet Halfyard, whose paper, "Hero's Journey, Heroine's Return: Buffy, Eurydice, and the Orpheus Myth" was another one of my favourites. In fact, when I had to vote for my fave paper for the Mr. Pointy Award (more on that later), I was torn between this one and Rhonda's. The genesis of Halfyard's paper was an intereseting one: at a 400th anniversary session of Monteverdi's Orfeo, she was called up and asked if the Orpheus myth plays any role in Buffy, and if so, could she talk about it. She thought about it, and decided yes, she could. So she used clips from Prophecy Girl, for example, to show how Buffy plays the role of Orpheus, descending into the underworld of the Master's domain with her black leather jacket over her prom dress, holding her crossbow like the lute that Orpheus is usually depicted holding, and as such she becomes the hero. But when she is overcome by the Master, he removes the black jacket, and she is now the damsel, or heroine, as Halfyard contended, and she becomes Eurydice, held forever in the underworld. As such, she becomes both the hero, and the girl the hero is trying to save.

She next talked about Angel's return, and that Buffy is able to bring him back from the underworld by doing the very thing Orpheus couldn't do -- she lays the ring on the ground, and walks away, and does NOT look back. And that's how Angel returns. Brilliant!! She pulled up a clip from Once More With Feeling where Buffy casts herself as Orpheus, descending into Sweet's underworld to save Eurydice (Dawn). The scenery is very much like the original production of Monteverdi's Orfeo (Halfyard pronounced this with absolute delight, which I loved), and when she begins to dance herself to death, Spike becomes her anti-Orpheus, saving her (she played the clip up to the point where Spike sings, "So one of us is living" and then stopped it, saying, "I can't bear to listen to Dawn's terrible line there" Hahahahahahaha!) And she said ultimately, Spike, the anti-Orpheus is the one left behind in hell in Chosen.

What a paper!

Next up was Dale Koontz, whose paper was entitled, "The One That Almost Got Away: Doyle and the Fish Story." Koontz's book is about issues of faith in the Whedonverse, and in her terrific paper, delivered in her exquisite southern accent (I could have listened to her talk all day), she talked about Doyle's short journey, and compared it to various biblical stories, particularly the story of Jonah. She said the name Doyle translates to "Dark foreigner" and that his visions, where he says he feels like his skull is on fire, are like Moses talking to God in the form of a burning bush. In "Hero," where Doyle sacrifices himself to save the group, it's like Jonah jumping off the side of the boat and being swallowed by a giant fish. It was nice to see someone bringing in faith issues in an academic paper, which is usually more of a secular realm, and I loved her analogies. (And the fact it was another paper on Angel!)

And now we were down to the penultimate session... over so soon? I wish this conference had gone on for weeks. Well, okay, I was missing my children terribly, and the few conversations I'd had with my 3-year-old on the phone, where she began crying in one and begging me to either come home or let her come and be with me where I was, were heartbreaking... but if this conference could just come my way at some point so I can see the kids every day, I'd be in heaven.

The final paper of the day for me was "Myth, Metaphor, Morality and Monsters: How BtVS and Other Works by Joss Whedon Changed Ethical Thought Forever." It was written by J. Michael Richardson and J. Douglas Rabb. Rabb couldn't be there, so another person helped deliver the paper with Richardson. The profs were from Lakehead University in Thunder Bay (more Canucks!) I was very intrigued by the title, and unfortunately I arrived a few moments into the paper (it was the only one I was late to) so I missed the opening. I'm thinking that's what went wrong for me -- I didn't hear the thesis, so when the paper moved into a hour-long discussion on biomedical ethics, I was lost. And not in a good way, on a desert island with Sawyer and Desmond and..... okay, I'm back. There were very few moments where it was brought back to Whedon's work, so it was difficult for me to ground it in something tangible for my mind. I'm sure the paper was absolutely brilliant, but biomedical ethics are way beyond my realm of understanding, so it was tough for me. He was speaking English, but no matter how many times I tried my hardest to focus, I just couldn't. I really wanted to be able to report back to y'all on this one, but I can't. There was one point they made that I grasped onto and it made sense (because it was brought back to Whedon) where they talked about Sartres' Jean Genet, and the idea of Bad Faith: Like Jean Genet, Faith becomes bad because that's the label that's been put on her. She became the object of another person's narrative, and lost her own. What that had to do with the rest of the paper, I couldn't tell ya, but it was a wonderful concept.

If someone else reading this right now was at that paper and made sense of it, please post and let me (and my readers) know what it was about, so I can do some justice to the paper. I can say it was presented with enthusiasm and charisma, and the presenters really enjoyed their topic.

The final final session of the day was called "Buffy Bookers" and it was a collection of everyone who's written a book on Buffy. I saw my name on the list and worried momentarily... like I had just run a marathon and was suddenly told, "You do remember the swimming leg of the race, right?" Uh... I'm sorry, what? But David quickly reassured me that it's really not much more than sitting there and talking about how we got published and what our books are about and sharing experiences -- good and bad -- about the publishing experience. Because I work on both sides -- I'm a writer, but also an editor and I acquire books -- I could provide some extra insight for the listeners, but I also was fascinated by some of the stories on the panel. Not being paid anything for the books? Having to pay your publisher to publish the book?! Not being edited at all when you hand it in?? The wrong version of the book going to press? Wow. I was stunned by some of the stories. As I told the people in the room, I'm interested in publishing academic pop culture volumes along the lines of what people in the room have done, but what I failed to mention was that in trade publishing, the bottom line is the sales. So if they can show me how there might be a chance for sales -- and I could convince the publisher to expect lower sales on these ones -- we might have a chance to start such a thing!

I got two pitches right after the panel. :)

At the panel, by the way, they presented the Mr. Pointy Award for best paper to Cynthea Masson, who'd delivered a paper I sadly missed on the Angel episode "The Girl in Question." Here's a photo of Mary Alice Money and Rhonda Wilcox holding a previous incarnation of the handmade award. We all joked about how much fun she'd have bringing that one onto the plane.

It was now off to dinner, and about 25 of us piled into several shuttles to head off to the Hamburger Barn (we were raving about its poshness) but when we got there? Closed. Apparently some things actually close on Sundays in Arkadelphia. Luckily, in that same parking lot was a pizza restaurant. So we piled in there instead (you should have seen the looks of horror on the faces of the one waitress and couple of guys making pizzas who had assumed it would be a slow night... Joss could have filmed it for a reaction shot) and had to wait for the buffet to be replenished a bit. Sue and I sat with Ian and Ryan and they regaled us with stories and we were in stitches for most of the dinner. I love those guys. I miss them already.

And then it was a sad goodbye, and back to the B&B where Matthew drove us (after I reminded him to stay on the right side of the road... and then admitted to taking a roundabout THE WRONG WAY AROUND once when I was in England. Gulp). Sue and I turned on our television (I mean, come on, we have our priorities) and it was a heavily censored version of Pulp Fiction, which I posted about because I was so shocked to see it. We watched as Marcellus Wallace called Butch a "cod jam mother-father" when there was a knock on the door and it was Rhonda inviting us out onto the veranda for round two of our discussions, and it was just as much fun as the first night.

I loved the Slayage Conference (can't you tell??) and I'm in full-on withdrawal now. I know I've missed a bunch of stuff (how is that possible?! you may be asking yourself, considering the length of these posts...) so I'll write up a separate post tomorrow morning on the last little bits I might have forgotten about.

Mainly I just wanted to say that this is an amazing group of people, and with about 150 people in attendance, give or take, I know I was meeting only a small number of Buffy academics. I've never felt so at home with a group of Buffy fans, and while I was worried I would be seen as an interloper who doesn't write about Buffy academically, no one ever made me feel that way while I was there. It was brilliant.

Jeanine Basinger said she was going to get Joss to come to the next Slayage conference (big cheer from the crowd, and she stepped out from behind her podium to do a little curtsey, which was hilarious). And while I'd be lying if I didn't say that was exciting, I'm looking forward to it more just to see all these people again.

If this is what academia could be, I'm starting to wish I'd taken my PhD after all.

Angel: After the Fall
The Buffy Season 8 comic book series has been a smashing success, and now IDW has begun Angel Season 6. Frankly, I had mixed emotions about "Chosen," the Buffy series finale. But I thought the Angel finale was pure genius, amazing from beginning to end. Some fans were upset about the ending, suggesting it was a cliffhanger that was meant to string fans along and not give us a resolution. But I loved it, and for me, the characters who are still standing in the final moments of the series will be the ones running into battle for all of eternity.

Now, we get a glimpse of one possibility of how it all could have gone down. Joss has said these comic books could be considered canon, and if that's the case, season 6 of Angel would have been one very, very, VERY dark season. This comic is dark, bleak, scary, and, to be honest, a little confusing. I had to read certain pages over and over to try to follow the action. Several of our favourite characters are back. Just as Buffy season 8 began in Buffy's head with her narrating the action for us, this one is in Angel's.

Oh, and Angel's final line of the television series -- "Personally, I want to slay the dragon. Let's go to work" -- is addressed in the opening pages.

I don't want to spoil the comic for those who haven't read it, but I'll definitely recommend it. Hey, it's the Whedonverse, how could I not? I do want to say one thing (and it's very positive) about the comic (I'll put it in white, and you can highlight it to read it):

Wesley is back, and anyone who has read my Angel book Once Bitten will know that I adored that character more than any of Whedon's others. I loved his development from kooky slapstick doofus to dark, serious, depressed, and troubled man. I thought his arc was handled beautifully, and when he died, my heart broke in two. So in this comic, when he first pops up in hell, all I could think of was, after everything that happened to him, this is where he ended up. He died and went to hell. And it was like a weight the size of an elephant was sitting on my chest to think that. Wesley just wanted peace, but now we know he'll never have it. Wah. That saddened me to no end... but probably in a good way, since if there's one thing Whedon can do, it's bring us serious, serious pain.

The series is only overseen by Whedon, and actually written by Brian Lynch. Lynch does a pretty good job, and I'm definitely intrigued enough by this convoluted first book to want to know what happens, and to know the backstory of how all these characters got here. The next book is due out mid-December, and it features that character we've all been waiting for. You know who I mean.