Monday, April 26, 2010

Lost Haiku: The Last Recruit

Because some people just can't wait until Tuesday to get their haikus on. ;)

"John Locke was not a
believer, Jack. He was a
sucker." Like, OUCH, dude.

Did Sayid kill Des?
No no no no no no NO!
"Go check if you'd like."

Likely concussion,
bleeding and kinda gross, but...
I still love you, Des.

"Jin!" "Sun!" Me: "The fence!"
Run run run!! "I love you Jin!"
"And I love you--" ZZZZZT!!!

Why does she bug me???
Tina Fey she is not. More
like Sarah Palin.

I will admit, though,
When Sawyer called her Widmore's
"Number Two," I laughed.

And now, over to you guys. And NO NEW LOST EP TOMORROW, but tune in for some more detailed Lost analysis on the season so far, and the Globe and Mail chat is still happening on Wednesday!


humanebean said...

Yes! Haikus are here!
Something to keep me going
with no LOST this week

"Good to see you, Jack"
"Wish I could say the same, John"
"Glad you ditched the Jeard"

humanebean said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
humanebean said...

"Claire, uh ... you look ...great."
"Thanks, Hurley. You like my hair?"
"Uh ... Libby would, I'm sure"

You mean to tell me
a whole show passed and no-one
blew up? ... Spoke too soon.

humanebean said...

"Look, brotha, I've been
shot by Ben Linus, kidnapped
from the hospital

by Charles Widmore, drugged
on a submarine, brought back
to this damn Island,

shot completely through
with electromagnetic
energy, sent to

a sideways timeline,
been driven into the bay
by a dead rock star,

seen bloody Daniel
in leather pants AND thrown down
this well by the guy

that I ran over
in the other timeline. I'm
havin' a BAD DAY!!"

"Oh, you think that YOU
have it bad, my friend? I'm
dead AND out of mousse."

SonshineMusic i.e. Rebecca T. said...

Die, Zoe. Die, Die!
Why is it that you bring out
homicidal thoughts?

Give me that walkie
I will smash it with this stick
so it has purpose.

Stalker Des follows
Claire into the lift and she
looks kinda wigged out

VW: bomist - the find dust left after an explosion

humanebean said...

"You do what I asked?"
"I let him talk to me first.
You know how THAT goes ..."

The Elizabeth
stood at anchor for three years?
One helluva boat.

"You can come aboard,
Claire - on one condition, though;
Squirrel Baby stays."

"Look, Claire, I'm sorry.
We need to trust each other ...
Can I have the gun?"

JS said...

@humanebean - I love the bad day haiku!!!

word verif - cupel: two cups

humanebean said...

thanks, JS! Glad you
liked that one. I though it might
need more 'brothas', there

SonshineMusic i.e. Rebecca T. said...

I don't know his name
I just took major advice
from him yesterday.

And I'm pretty sure
We introduced ourselves at
the coffee maker

But I have no clue
what his first name is, though I'm
here in the ambo

VW: crans - the phonetic way to color

humanebean said...

"Welcome aboard, Jack"
"So, what's up with you and Kate?"

"Hey! Why'd Jack jump off??"
"Relax, Freckles. I just said
'nice day for a swim'"

At last, Jin and Sun
are reunited. Thank God
they turned the fence off

"Wait! We had a deal!"
"Yeah, well, deal's off. What part of
Widmore don't you get?"

Teebore said...

"Were you my father?"
asks Jack. "Uh, yeah, sure I was,"
Locke shiftily says.

Whew! I'm glad Desmond
wasn't compelled to pull a
Locke on pregnant Claire.

Enjoy your swim, Jack!
Whoa! Jack's cooler than Sawyer.
I've seen everything.

Nikki Stafford said...

"Jack. I'm your fah-thah."
Then Locke pulls out a saber
And cuts off Jack's hand.

humanebean said...

You'd have Dad issues
too, if your pop was played by
a Locke-ness Monster

humanebean said...

Ilana is a
lawyer? I would have guessed an

David waits for Jack
to finish surgery on
Locke. Hope he's patient

Mom will pick him up
if the surgery runs long.
Yay! Can't wait to see!

Jack sees Locke's face and
says, "I think I know this guy...
... he's kind of a jerk."

Back on the Island,
Locke says, "You're with me now, Jack."
Like that's a GOOD THING?

humanebean said...

Where IS everyone?
Blam? M. Chou Chauve-Souris?
No haiku love, guys?

SonshineMusic i.e. Rebecca T. said...

I am lurking here
*waves hello to humanebean*
feeling haiku-less

humanebean said...

Let the Sonshines in!
Fear not - you are not alone
I'm just haikuckoo

SonshineMusic i.e. Rebecca T. said...

But we two seem to
have been left by all the rest
It's very haikruel.

And that was such a
terrible haiku pun thing
*tries to be haikul*

humanebean said...

Don't listen to those
who say 'puns are the lowest
form of humor'. Bah!

What do THEY know, eh?
Cindy Lauper was right: Girls
Just Wanna Have Pun

The Beach Boys: We'll Have
Pun, Pun, Pun 'Till Daddy Takes
The T-Bird Away

Even The Beatles sang
of puns: "I Am The Eggman,

Verification word: "welanoph" - What you should leave alone

Teebore said...

I can't disagree:
puns truly are the highest
form of comedy.

SonshineMusic i.e. Rebecca T. said...

"welanoph" Bwa ha!
I just don't think that I can
leave it all alone.

VW: amitingl? - What LOLCatz say when their paws fall asleep.

Joan Crawford said...

@Sonshine - Give me that walkie
I will smash it with this stick
so it has purpose.


And I'm pretty sure
We introduced ourselves at
the coffee maker

Hahaha! So true!