Wednesday, March 07, 2007

You Wanna Be On Top?
America's Next Top Model started up again last week, and I didn't get a chance to blog on it. Because Lost will be starting up in about 3 minutes, I'll keep this one short, too. But needless to say, this cycle has ALL of the things I love love love about this show. Last week we were introduced to Sarah, who reminded us over and over again that she was a photographer who photographs people on photo shoots in her role as a photographer; Renee, the mom of a 7-month-old, who *sniff* loves her son SO MUCH and just *snort* wants his life to be better than hers and *sob* she's doing this JUST FOR HIM and she hates all the other girls; Natasha, the seeming mail order bride from Russia who loves Tyra and modelling and wants to be top model so badly she could taste it in mouth; Jael, who's a little crazy but super-cool, if only I could understand a word the girl said -- between her and Miss Jay they could have a battle of the mushmouths; Jaslene, who tried out for top model cycle 7 and was booted, even though she had this crazy signature move of putting her hand over her mouth like she was shocked all the time; and a bunch of others.

Last week's photo shoot was ridiculous... wait, no, I mean IMPORTANT because it made them TAKE A STAND on issues, and put them in stupid... I mean IMPORTANT poses showing how political they all were. In other words, it was hysterically funny and awesome. Kathleen, who had big big hair, was possibly the thickest model they've EVER had on this show, and I was super-sad when she was voted off because I'm not sure I've ever laughed watching this show as hard as I did when she talked to the camera about her "political issue." When asked if she really was anti-fur, she said, "No, I think fur is great. I love wearing fur. It makes you look hot." Twiggy then challenged her at the judging, saying she was fiercely anti-fur, and how could Kathleen possibly be for it? Kathleen responded that fur doesn't necessarily need to be obtained through inhumane means. She said many animals die of natural causes, and you don't have to kill an animal to take its fur, you simply wait for it to die. My husband and I were gasping for air we were laughing so hard. She was voted off, and is now undoubtedly starting up her own line of fur fashion, "Kathleen's Kool Koats," where she stands in the woods waiting for a groundhog to drop dead at her feet so she can skin it.

This week's didn't have a moment as awesome as that one, but it did have a hilarious line that wasn't actually ironic; Jael, when you can understand her beyond the monotonous, "mumblemumble wahwahwah" way of talking she exhibits, is actually really smart and has a very DRY, wry sense of humour. Her comment about Sarah during the fashion show was hysterical: "While we're on the catwalk, Sarah's chest decides to be exposed to all the high school children and their parents. I thought it was very liberating for her and was very proud that she got to experience that next to me." LOL!

Samantha the good girl from Alabama went home, which isn't that upsetting because she'd barely said a word to this point, and I won't be missing her. But Natasha was in the bottom two, and she just doesn't seem to understand the instructions she's given, so she'll really have to buck up for next week. I don't have a clear favourite yet, but I'm sure I will soon. However, while I have no feelings for Brittany either way, I thought her fashion walk was ludicrous and drunken, yet they gave her the [ugly] award for best walk. Makes you wonder what they were judging her against: a calf that was just born??


The Chapati Kid said...

Fun episode, although I got bugged when Jaslene started getting too cocky. I love to hate Rene. And I thought Dionne and Jael did a great shoot. I think Jael is my favourite character so far, because she's just there for the ride. And she's such a flake. Oh, I can't wait to talk about Lost! I'm just waiting for the post to go up. (What a nerd I am.)

Crissy Calhoun said...

i couldn't believe how many times Tyra had to show everyone that she would have done a MUCH better job with the posing.

i loved Renee's conspiracy theory that she was getting all the hard assignments and Jaslene had it easy. She's bonkers.

Nikki Stafford said...

Chapatikid: I think Jaslene is definitely cocky, though I did feel a twinge of sympathy for her when the runway guy said, "And... Jaslene!" and she said, "Yes!" all giddy and grinny, and he told her she was a wreck, and the smile didn't fade, it disappeared instantly. It's like that episode of the Simpsons episode where Bart pauses the TV tape and says, "And you can just see his heart break right... there!"
Crissy: I know. Her whole, "This pose is porn, but this... fashion. Porn... fashion." And I'm thinking hmm... you seem to know a lot about BOTH.